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Monday, December 4, 2023

Decemystery (2023) 4: The Bagodemon

 

When I was growing up, there was a plot of land across the street from me with a small touch of woods near it. I remember exploring them a bit as a kid and thinking it was the coolest thing in the world. I never found much of anything interesting, barring snakes and a small mound with rocks that, in hindsight, looked like a makeshift grave. It wasn’t, but I remember me and a few friends pretending it was. We were stupid—and I know, at the very least, that hasn’t changed on my end.


While there weren’t any scary monsters or abandoned cabins in the woods where I lived, I still hold some fond memories of aimlessly wandering around. One day, I will find myself a scary monster or abandoned cabin, though. For now, I live vicariously through weird stories I find on the Internet. It’s a lot less exciting than it sounds, but it’s better than nothing!


That brings us to today’s Decemystery 2023 entry. It’s a tale from the great state of Texas known only as The Bagodemon. It’s one that I had never heard of up until I found it, a theme that will be quite common throughout this month. So come along, dear reader, and let’s see what secrets the woods of Lone Star State hold!

How it Feels to Chew Five Gum


I found this story on the Paranormal World Wiki on a page entitled “The Borderline-Bogus Bubblegum Bagodemon.” That reference to bubblegum is by no means a joke; it’s a central part of this mystery. It’s also one of the reasons I chose to cover it.


Although the Paranormal World Wiki was where I first found the story, the original source is the Unexplained Mysteries forums. On January 1, 2006, a user by the name of Shadow Sentinel made a post on the forum’s “Cryptozoology, Myths and Legends” board entitled “BagoDemon.” Before I continue, I want to say that I’ll be referring to Shadow as “Steve,” because I’m not about to envision Shadow the Hedgehog camping. My sincerest apologies to any Sonic the Hedgehog fans who are reading this.


The first thing I want to make a note of is the first thing Steve said. He began his post by saying that he knows of Skinwalkers and that they match the description of what he and his girlfriend saw while on a camping trip. I’ll just say this right now: what he saw doesn’t match a Skinwalker in the slightest, but I’ll go over why later. For now, just keep that in mind.


Anyway, Steve continues by saying that he’s from the southeastern part of Texas, which is where Galveston and Houston are located. Steve claims that around those parts, people speak of a creature known as “The Bagodemon.” I’ll get into this claim more later because there’s a fair bit that I have to say.


As for what The Bagodemon is, it sounds like something out of a Doom game. It’s said to be a purple-whitish color with glowing red eyes. It can also stretch itself, allowing it to move around by “sticking itself from tree to tree,” like it’s made of gum. When I said the bubblegum reference wasn’t a joke, I meant it. I have to wonder what would happen if someone were to step on it or hit it with a car.


That finally brings us to Steve’s encounter. According to him, about four months prior to his post (which would mean this happened in September of 2005), he—along with his girlfriend—went hiking. Out of curiosity, I looked to see if I could determine which one they’d taken, but that sure as hell wasn’t happening. As it turns out, Texas has a lot of hiking trails. Who would have thought, given the state’s immense size? Not me, no siree!


At around 11:00 p.m. (or 23:00 for my 24-hour time using readers), the duo heard “grunting noises” a few yards ahead of them. Steve likened the noise to a mix of a pig and a weeping dog. I have no idea what this would sound like, and I don’t think I want to know. Despite the odd sound, Steve and his girlfriend continued to walk—only to have “a crud load of leaves” fall on them. Curious, Steve shined his flashlight into the trees to see what caused it. He thought it was a bird or squirrel. Suffice it to say, he was incorrect.


When the light hit the culprit, it let out an ear-splitting screech—and for once, it actually sounded like it was as unbearable as it was made out to be. Steve nearly fell to his knees (the creature’s name must have been Layla) while his girlfriend momentarily fainted. He described it as sounding like numerous animals “screaming in fear or anger” at once. This lasted for 15 seconds—or so Steve believed. I’m a tad skeptical of this estimation since I have to imagine their eardrums would have ruptured if it was as loud as he claims. Though, hey, I’m not an expert on how many decibels something needs to be to make your eardrums pop or how long it needs to last.


Once the creature—which Steve believed was The Bagodemon—was done screaming like my fifth-grade math and science teacher, it supposedly chuckled—or made a noise akin to chuckling. It then launched one of its arms to a nearby tree and left. Somehow, with this one action, this thing managed to be a better Mr. Fantastic than Miles Teller was in 2015’s Fant4stic.


It was while the thing was leaving that Steve also got a better look at the creature—and I want to say right now that it’s here where there’s a major discrepancy with what was said earlier. According to him, the thing “had the shape of a human male, only bald.” It also lacked a face and instead had “one pulsating red glow” on its forehead. So, rather than having a pair of glowing red eyes, it was Cyclopean; I guess you can chalk it up to him being shaken up by the screeching, but I still find it a bit odd.


On one final note, Steve also said that the thing lacked hands—at least, hands that you’d expect a human to have. In their place were “structures” that were similar to scythes. I have to wonder if it’ll turn into a Scizor if I throw a metal coat at it.


That’s where Steve’s original post ended; he said to reply if anyone happened to know anything more about Skinwalkers. Well, he got a fair number of replies, so instead of jumping right into the theories, I want to go over them. So, onward we go!


The Rest of the Thread


Before we even dive into this segment, I want to say that there’s one reply from Steve in the thread that I want to skip over as it relates to a section after this one.


Anyway, I’ll only be talking about the replies that I believe add something to the story; this will be akin to what I did yesterday for the story of The Little Blue Man with the comment section. With that said, there is one I’m going to be glossing over now because I want to touch upon it in the next section. For now, the first one we’ll be going over comes from a user named “Paranormalcy,” who had the following to say:


“bago” is an intrinsic Spanish verb meaning “to pod” or “to go to seed”. Since you’re in Texas, this is likely the language where this name came from, though it could be someone in that area also.


Out of curiosity, I decided to ask two of my friends—both of whom speak Spanish—if this was true. One of them said it was, while the other said no and that it meant “to pay” and added that it’s slang. The contradictory answers prompted me to go look up the definition myself, only to find that “Bago” apparently means “new” Filipino. Now, granted, that’s what Google Translate says. So, I would take that with a huge grain of salt.


I was unable to find much of anything else to help determine which answer was right, but “Bago” has other applications in other languages. Regardless, I wanted to mention this since Texas borders Mexico, which means its culture has been heavily influenced by it. As a result, a lot of people in Texas speak Spanish; if The Bagodemon is (or was) real, it may have been a Spanish legend.


Alas, I don’t know of any like that, and as far as I can tell, there isn’t one like it. I tried snooping around online for a bit, but nothing came close to matching the description of this bubblegummy abomination. If I am wrong and a story does align with this one, by all means, correct me in the comment section. Additionally, feel free to comment if you know what “Bago” means since I cannot give an answer with any degree of certainty.


Assuming that Paranormalcy is right, however, that would mean The Bagodemon was most likely named because it had some connection to nature. Or someone thought it sounded good. I think it’s a pretty solid name, so I won’t argue if that’s the reason.


Anyway, moving on from that tangent, the next post of note was made by a user named “stacy274.” I have no idea what the numbers are indicative of, but I’d like to think they signify how many years remain until man colonizes Pluto; before anyone tells me how or why that’s impossible, I ask that you let me dream.


If you’re curious, Stacy never followed up on this. Out of curiosity, I tried to check her account to see her post history to see if she’d ever mentioned The Bagodemon or something else like it in another thread. It was only then that I found out you need an account to view another person’s profile; normally, I wouldn’t bother with making one. However, in this case, I actually did; go ahead and visit my profile if you want! I have no idea how frequently I’ll use it, but at least I can say that I managed to snag a username in honor of one of my favorite NASCAR drivers!


Also, as a brief side note, please don’t post on this thread or try to harass anyone. While I have enough faith in you and anyone else who reads this, I wanted to put this out there, just in case; I’d rather not have someone necro a thread that’s over a decade old.


Getting back on track, I found that, to my dismay, Stacy lacked any follow-up posts; in fact, she “last visited” on September 26, 2006. So, whether or not she ever got an answer from her friend is up in the air. Personally, I doubt it, but that’s beside the point. Nay, the point is that there’s still a fair bit of the thread left, so let’s get back on track.


The post of note is from Steve, who added that the creature—although it stuck to trees like it was made of gum—looked to be made of either mud or ectoplasm. I’m guessing that Steve meant this literally, which makes me envision the Batman villain Clayface, only this thing was made of mud instead of clay. How delightfully unclean; I think I will go take a bath in industrial-strength bleach so I can feel clean now.


In all seriousness, this detail is something I wish that he’d mentioned in his original post because, at first, I had no intention of checking the rest of the thread. It was after I’d skimmed it that I found a handful of things that I wanted to check. This wasn’t one of them; I glossed over it, and in doing so, I found this. That actually put a slight hamper on the theories, though I think it goes without saying that there isn’t a creature out there that’s comprised of mud or ectoplasm (or gum, for that matter) that acts anything like The Bagodemon. Still, this was something that irked me greatly, and I wish more people would put these kinds of details in their original posts. Omitting them is obnoxious.


The next noteworthy post was from Steve, who said he’d be returning to the location with some friends to hunt for The Bagodemon. He said they’d bring three digital cameras, a tape record, and three video recorders. Given that this was in 2006, I’m sure they’d capture this thing in camera quality that would make The Bagodemon look like the average cryptid footage we have in 2023. So grainy, low-quality, and indiscernible, just the way nobody likes it!


A week after posting about his plans, Steve reported back, saying that he’d just returned from a two-night trip, claiming that it was rife with strange occurrences and that The Bagodemon was incredibly smart, adding to that he doesn’t even know if The Bagodemon is even a creature. I’m not sure what Steve meant by this, whether he meant that it was an extraterrestrial or something else. At this point, it feels like this is what would happen if you let J.J. Abrams make a forum thread about a cryptid.


The most noteworthy thing—in my eyes, anyway—is that the FBI was apparently “involved with half of this thing.” I’m guessing Steve meant that they were also looking for The Bagodemon, which is something I’ll expand upon in the theories section. For now, just keep this in mind because it’s important.


Steve rounds off the post by saying that he’ll return with the full story another time on account of it being lengthy. A few users were a bit disappointed by him teasing what sounded like an epic tale of mystery and intrigue; Paranormalcy, on the other hand, was skeptical but nonetheless curious to see where Steve’s story would lead. And so, they waited with bated breath…


Until July.


It was on July 27, 2006, that Steve finally returned with another post on what was, at that point, a dead thread. If you were expecting a satisfying conclusion to this story, then I’m going to crush your hype like a thousand-pound weight being dropped onto an apple. Here’s what Steve had to say with his 6-month-late follow-up post:


A few months ago I posted this topic and haven't been able to post my data I collected because of certain problems. I WILL post them later tonight and just a little spoiler to everyone, the government focuses on supernatural things, not just alien.


Attached to the post was this image.



I decided to see where the image was from, and I found a site called Ghosts of America that hosted it; that site claims it’s from a cemetery in Carey, Ohio. Here’s what the site had to say:


Workers for the cemetery in Carey see a large man walking around looking to find a lover. It has been witnessed that he has kissed several tombstones of ladies waiting for one to come to him. - Ghost picture submitted by Mattdogg


Another site—a blog named El Universo Paranormal (The Paranormal Universe)—had the same photograph and claimed it was from Springfield Cemetery in Illinois. I think this is the actual origin of the image, but I could be wrong as I’m not too familiar with haunted cemeteries (outside of Bachelor’s Grove Cemetery). It was a fun digression from the story—well, for me, it was.


Regardless of the image’s true origin, I don’t know if Steve was trying to say that he captured the image on his two-night hunt or if it was just attached to generate a bit of hype. Whatever the case may be, it honestly confused me a bit.


On a more amusing note, some of the users took to looking at the image and tried to figure out what the abnormality was. One person thought it was The Undertaker. I now refuse to believe that it was anything other than that; it’s way too funny for me not to believe that.


The following day, Steve returned to the thread, not to post about his adventure, but to say that there’d been a family emergency and that he would try to get to posting about his January escapade later that day. He never did; in fact, he never returned to the thread, and, as it stands, the thread remains dead. Whatever happened on those two nights remains a mystery.


With that, the thread comes to an end, but it’s still not time for the theories. No, there’s still some stuff I want to talk about; now, onward to the next section!


Hunting for The Bagodemon


It’s time for one of these sections again because, by God, I have a lot that I want to go over. To start off, I want to discuss the so-called “legend” of The Bagodemon. I said at the start of the previous section that I’d go into more detail, and now is the time. However, there’s one tiny problem: there’s nothing about this thing online—aside from the original post by Steve and the page on the Paranormal World Wiki. No book I own that details mysterious creatures or anything of that nature mentions it, either.


This is where that one post from Steve comes in. According to him, the reason for that is because most locals consider the story to be “ridiculous.“ I’m not sure why, given other areas in the United States have held festivals dedicated to the weird monsters that have been seen or tried to capitalize on them. South Carolina has a festival for the Lizard Man of Scape Ore Swamp. Meanwhile, Point Pleasant, West Virginia, has one centered around Mothman, and New Jersey named its hockey team after The New Jersey Devil. I’m serious; their hockey team is The New Jersey Devils. They’re my favorite hockey team for that reason.


The claim that locals have labeled the story as “ridiculous” only further piqued my curiosity. Anyone who knows me personally will know very well that the more unbelievable a story is made out to be, the more I’ll want to know about it. Just as moths are attracted to light, I am attracted to anything and everything absurd; it’s magnetic.


The first thing I did was snoop through Steve’s post history to see if he’d posted anything else of merit; this was the actual reason I’d made an account. Stacy’s post history was an additional bonus. To my delight, Steve did have some posts after his final one on The Bagodemon thread; let’s go over them.


The first was on a thread called “Shadow being Experience,” which Steve chimed in on July 29, 2006. His post had the same picture as the one from earlier; he merely said that the “shadow being” may have been a demonic entity or a poltergeist. The image was just there because I guess Steve found it interesting. He never included it in any post after this one, so it wasn’t a part of his forum signature.


The second post was made on the same day in a thread called “Mysterious Screeching… Thing!” In this thread, which was started on April 7, 2006,  a user asked about a weird sound they hear every spring in New Jersey. They said it wasn’t a Screech Owl and likened the sound to that of a “dying goblin,” which I have no idea what that sounds like as I’ve never heard a goblin die in real life. In video games and movies, yes, but not in real life; I’ve yet to hear such a potentially dreadful sound. The first response, which was from a user by the name of “frogfish,” agreed with me, saying:


Screech Owls are common in NJ...How do you know what a dying Goblin sounds like?


Glad to see frogfish and I are on the same page!


Anyway, getting back on track, Steve chimed in on July 29 with the following post:


Actually jellyfish of doom, since I belive you saw my forum on The BagoDemon, AND you say you saw something similar as to the same thing I saw, my guess is that it could possibly be the same thing the starter of this thread is describing. The Bagodemon's screech fits very will with the discription of the sound, if I knew how long the sound lasts and what part of New Jersey he lives in, I may be able to clarify if it may be another BagoDemon. Please tell me how long the sound lasts and what area of NJ, you live in!!!


“Jellyfish of Doom,” who at some point changed their name to “The Carnivore,”  responded to Steve with this gem:


Aye, I have. do bagodemons look like 6 foot long porcupines with pink eyes?


I’m guessing that this is whatever Mr. Carnivore saw, but I wasn’t willing to comb through 111 pages of posts that he’d made. Maybe sometime down the line, I’ll go through it; for now, that’s not on my to-do list, especially when I still have 20 other write-ups to do after this one.


The next two things to catch my eye were threads made by Steve, and both are a little on the odd side. Both involve aliens and have nothing to do with the story of The Bagodemon, and as a result, I don’t want to linger on them for too long.


The first thread was made on July 22, 2006, and was asking for documents related to Majestic. This only had to do with Majestic 12, which was a super secret group tied to UFOs and whatnot. I’d love to do a write-up on them one day, but the story is so long and extensive that I have absolutely zero faith that I could do it justice. If you’re into UFOs and the extensive lore behind them, or you want to learn about said lore, I recommend reading up on Majestic 12. It’s a great read, if nothing else.


The second thread is a lot more interesting—and a whole lot longer, too. It was posted on August 13, 2006, and was entitled “Alien file….” Here’s what Steve had to say:


Through some trusting resources I have managed to rounge up a file the government didn't really plan on showing to the public. It pretty much explains itself. It's basically an interview with a skeptic from a man who works for a higher form of government.


I’m guessing that “rounge” is supposed to be “scrounge,” for those who have no idea what Steve may have meant.


Steve would later claim that he’d post more; he never did, and he hasn’t visited his account since September 15, 2006. I guess the Men in Black got to him or something.


This thread was long—like, way longer than I have any desire to go through. It’s exactly as he described it, though; it’s a supposed interview about aliens and how the United States government has had contact with them and whatnot. It’s kind of interesting, and while I know there have been a bunch of Congressional Hearings about UFOs and aliens in recent times, this is something I take with an exorbitant amount of salt. I’ve read so many supposed “leaks” that prove the existence of aliens and whatnot, and this read like the dozen or so that I’ve seen on 4chan.


The only other thing of note is that Steve got a bit annoyed when nobody commented on the thread after a bit; a few people were skeptical, while others weren’t. I personally am, but I digress. That’s where my escapade into Steve’s profile ended; there was nothing else of merit to touch upon, and as I said above, he stopped logging on in September of ‘06.


After that, I resorted to my two most trusted friends: Bing and Google. When all else fails, just look up the creature’s name; it’s a foolproof tactic. Besides, someone out there has to have talked about it!


Oh, well, would you look at that! Nobody outside of Steve and the Paranormal World Wiki has discussed this thing. Gee, that’s unfortunate.


Yeah, much to my dismay, there are no other sources on this story online; I went so far as to try and remember if maybe there was some book I’d read that mentioned it. Even though I’m one to be skeptical of memories due to their imperfect nature, I thought that maybe I’d get lucky. Alas, no dice; I could not remember anything.


I even scoured through a couple of books I own, but nothing matched up with this thing. I expected this—I can’t say that it sounds like anything I’ve heard, but I still had a sliver of hope. Alas, it was not meant to be; I came up empty-handed, not unlike someone who was late to the gold rush.


And so, that brings us to the end of this story: a dead end of dead ends. The Bagodemon is a strange little story; taking it at face value leaves me feeling like I got trolled. The fact its movement was compared to gum when it sticks to things is one of the most comical and outlandish descriptions I’ve read for a cryptid in my life.


Anyway, as is the norm, there are a fair number of theories for us to go over. So, without further ado, let’s dig in!


Theories


1. A hoax


You know, as of the time of this writing, I have a bit of a headache. Looking at this theory, I have to wonder if it’s because I’ve seen so much that my body is having a negative reaction.


Okay, I won’t treat this theory as a joke; I honestly can’t. Although I air on the side of caution when it comes to labeling something as a hoax (as I said yesterday during the write-up for The Little Blue Man), this story does have a lot going against it.


The first thing is one that plagues every single theory: the lack of additional sightings. Hell, the lack of any information outside of Steve’s post is a major strike against the story. Now, granted, every story out there doesn’t get the same publicity as, say, Mothman. So, in the interest of fairness, I won’t hold that against the case. However, Steve stated that it was a “legend among locals,” which would indicate to me that this story is well-known among the populace in southeastern Texas. Yet, as far as I can tell, there’s absolutely nothing to indicate that it’s ever been spoken about online or anywhere else.


Again, every story doesn’t get the same amount of publicity. This goes for any kind of mystery, be it a strange creature being seen or a missing person’s case. There are many contributing factors to this, so I won’t harp on for the next ten paragraphs. It just bothers me greatly that Steve claims this is some local legend, yet it lacks anything about it online. Surely, if this was well-known, it would be talked about more.


If there’s anything going against this theory. It’s the same thing that’s always going against it: the lack of any apparent motive. None of Steve’s other posts struck me as odd or indicated that he was trolling, though it’s not unheard of for one person to decide to pull a prank when bored, especially if they have no intention of sticking around that area for a long period.


Anyway, as you can tell, there is a fair bit going for and against this theory. I believe we’ve gone over everything that needs to be said, though, so let’s move on before I begin to talk in circles non-stop.


2. An escaped government experiment


Ah, the United States government. It’s as efficient as, well, most governments. Make of that what you will since the main point is that the US has a government that simultaneously can do everything, yet nothing whatsoever. It’s the pinnacle of perfection and worthless—at least in the realm of conspiracy theories!


There have been claims of the US government having conducted experiments on animals and people for longer than I’ve been alive. Contrary to what some may say, there is some truth to them. Things like Project MKUltra existed. Nowadays, experiments are performed on lab animals when testing out medicine. However, when it comes to the more fantastical claims, like super soldiers or mutating things, that’s considerably more dubious.


With this theory, we have the idea that this was some abomination that escaped from a secret government facility and was now lurking in the woods of southeastern Texas. This is by no means a novel claim; people have put forward theories that El Chupacabra, Mothman, and various Bigfoot-type creatures are all escaped government experiments. The reasons for their creation vary, though it usually ends up being “it was meant to be a weapon” or “just because.” 


In the case of The Bagodemon, one can assume that it would fall into the former lane. Its apparent powerful screech would be useful for incapacitating enemies, and its ability to stretch its limbs—along with its scythe-like appendages—would make it deadly in both close and long-ranged combat. Unfortunately, it seems like it read one too many edgy 2000s thrillers about being a weapon for the government, so it escaped. I’m going to assume that it left a trail of blood and gore in its wake before it got out of whatever facility it was in.


Where this theory falls apart is with the lack of any concrete evidence. While the United States government has done plenty of morally questionable things in the past, I’m unfamiliar with anything even remotely close to making Alex Mercer, but with no face. On top of that, it would be pretty easy to prove or disprove this theory by submitting a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) request. Though, that’s a topic for another write-up this month.


There’s also the lack of any additional sightings—a flaw that, as I said earlier, is prevalent in every theory. In this case, not only were there no other documented sightings of The Bagodemon before (or after) Steve’s, but you’d think there would be an odd increase in government (and military) presence in the area. If you want a good example of what I mean, just look at how quickly the military was on the scene after The Kecksburg UFO Incident, a story that I desperately need to rewrite.


With all of that said, Steve’s claim that the FBI was involved is kind of interesting. I recall hearing about a creature called “The Beast of the Land Between the Lakes,” which supposedly killed a family that had been camping. One person, a friend of the family, survived and said that the Feds were at the scene investigating. So, if nothing else, that’s not unprecedented. The only question I have is why the FBI—an organization primarily made to assist with criminal investigations—would be hunting a monster that can stick to trees. That sounds a little bit out of their league.


Additionally, it wouldn’t be too out of the norm for the FBI to be called in if there was some other government agency doing work; the FBI could provide a cover for them while they hunted this thing. Though that does make me wonder exactly how they caught wind of this thing—assuming it wasn’t an escaped government experiment. Did someone else see it and report it? Did someone go missing? Or was there some federal agent investigating the Unexplained-Mysteries forum who stumbled across Steve’s post and reported it? I really hope it’s the last one because that mental image of some grizzled fed sitting behind a computer, reading a forum where people talk about demonic entities and other cryptids, is comedic gold to me.


Just imagine: you spend your whole life aspiring to make a difference in the world. You then spend years upon years training to become an FBI special agent, and you’re tasked with reading about people who say they saw sea serpents, heard scary sounds, saw shadow people, UFOs or aliens, or a monster that can stick to trees like it’s made of bubblegum. One has to ask themselves at that point what they did to deserve such a cruel, unnatural fate.


Oh well, I digress. Overall, while I think this theory is honestly logical (seriously, I could understand how something like The Bagodemon could, in theory, be useful), there’s nothing to back up the claim. I also doubt the government would have a military base near two major metropolitan areas. Unless we’re to adopt the theory of “Endelss Elevators,” but that’s a story from another time—maybe next year, but I’m not making any promises.


3. An alien


This theory is one that, on its surface, may sound far-fetched to some. I understand that if your concept of aliens is humanoid beings, such as Greys or Nordic Aliens. However, if you’ve read this blog before, you’ll know that extraterrestrials are by no means limited to just humanoids. They come in many forms: giant brains, beer cans, robotic flowers, and a bizarre tree (or plant) creature!


Indeed, aliens are—by all accounts—many things. So, on paper, this theory has a surprisingly strong case that it can make. Add onto that the possibility of the creature’s ability to stick to trees being tied to a high-tech suit and its alien appearance, and I’d say that this is probably the most rational explanation. Well, at least in terms of theories that don’t outright dismiss the story.


However, there are a few glaring flaws with this theory. The first is one that, admittedly, you can brush off to some degree if you want, but I tend to be unable to. As far as I can tell, there wasn’t a rash of UFO sightings in the area where this story took place; such incidents tend to include sightings of aliens themselves. Now, granted, “southeastern Texas” is a large area to go off of. The United States is a massive place, and some states are larger than some countries (Alaska, the largest state in the union, on its own dwarfs a fair number of European nations).


While Texas may not hold the honor of the largest state, that doesn’t mean it’s small. On its own, Texas is larger than a fair number of European nations (like Britain, Italy, Germany, Sweden, Iceland, and Denmark). So, it’s more than a little hard to guess where this might have occurred and, as a result, figure out if there were a large number of UFO reports. I tried looking on Think About It Docs to see if they had any reports from Texas from September of 2005, but I came up empty-handed.


But, hey, maybe I was unable to find them; I’m not that great of a researcher, after all. However, that brings us to the other issue with this theory—and it’s the exact same as the one from the other theories. That lack of reports is rather hard to ignore. Now, granted, plenty of people don’t report seeing a UFO. Some fear being ostracized by their peers and, heck, even their families. Others, meanwhile, rationalize what they saw (and I’m willing to say that more than a few of those people ended up being correct). So, I’ll concede a bit on that front.


Nevertheless, it’s hard to ignore the complete lack of any additional reports of anything like the thing that Steve saw is incredibly detrimental. One of the most vital things when it comes to supposedly seeing any sort of weird thing is having others to back you up, be they people who were with you or strangers who also saw the same thing at a different point.


Those additional reports can at least say that something was seen. Whether it was explainable or not, who knows, but people saw something, and that something could still be out there. Well, at the time, I doubt it would be alive nowadays. Unless there was a breeding population, but I digress. My point is that I firmly believe that if there was more than just the one Bagodemon, there’d be more than one sighting on record.


This theory has gone on for long enough, though. I’m willing to admit that it would answer a lot of the more peculiar aspects of the story. Unfortunately, the lack of additional information means that you’d have to gamble a lot for it to work. If you’re willing to take that risk, then more power to you. Personally, I try to refrain from any kind of high-risk gambling.


4. An interdimensional abomination


I’m going to say right off the bat that theory, at the absolute least, can get away with the lack of other documented sightings. If it was an interdimensional being, then one can assume that our reality and whatever one The Bagodemon is from have yet to overlap again. Too bad that doesn’t explain how it has become a local legend in the first place, but oh well, maybe it was a really long overlap.


Aside from that, there is a decent amount going for this theory. The appearance of the creature was, by all accounts, otherworldly; I think you can realistically say it didn’t look like anything that belongs in this universe. Scythe-like appendages, one giant glowing red eye, no face, and the ability to launch parts of its body, all the while being able to stick to trees like gum; this is unlike anything I’ve ever heard of. If you told me it was from another dimension, I’d easily believe you.


Unfortunately, that’s about where things end. Aside from the lack of additional sightings and the lack of solid proof that other dimensions exist, there’s no indication of anything else strange happening wherever Steve’s encounter took place. It’s a true shame, but it is what it is. Now, onto the next theory!


5. A demon


It’s time to rip and tear until it is done.


I’ve said it before—as in, yesterday—and I will say it again now and later this month: I know virtually nothing about demons. I’m not a demonologist, and I’d much rather steer clear of such topics when possible. I don’t want to tempt fate by trying to learn about things that are, more often than not, said to be evil.


With that said, I felt that it would be a really stupid idea to omit this theory. After all, the name of the creature is “Bagodemon.” To me, someone clearly viewed this thing as demonic in nature, not too unsurprising since whatever Steve saw came across as less than pleasant.


Assuming that “Bago” translates to either “to pod” or “to go to seed,” I’d hazard a guess and say that this thing was some sort of plant or Earth demon. I have no idea if either of those are things, but I’m going based solely on its name in the literal sense. If my other friend is right, and Bago means “to pay,” then I assume it’s a debt collector from Hell. Should it be the Filipino translation, and it, in fact, means “new demon,” then I guess this is the edgy mid-2000s reboot of demons. Insert yet another Shadow the Hedgehog joke here; I know that at least one person reading this wants to.


Aside from the lack of additional encounters hindering this theory a bit, I genuinely know so little about topics like nature spirits and demons that I can’t add much else to this. I blame myself and myself, but oh well. I think it’s better to acknowledge it than to omit it entirely.


6. A Skinwalker


Okay, so this theory was one that was put forward by Steve. I’m going to get the most glaring and obvious issue out of the way right off the bat: the Internet has warped what a Skinwalker is to Hell and back.


Skinwalkers are—to the best of my understanding—people in the Navajo tribe who are kind of like witches. They aren’t viewed as positively as medicine men and other “community healers.” I should add that, in the past, I stated that medicine men and Skinwalkers were more or less one and the same. They aren’t; I’m just dumb.


That’s at least what I understand; I have to admit that it’s kind of hard for my pea-brain to understand the intricacies of this stuff. I was never the best at learning it. How unfortunate that my biggest passion in life now requires me to understand it. Oh well; what I can say and explain, with a lot more confidence, is what a Skinwalker isn’t.


If you go onto YouTube, you will find countless videos featuring scary stories from people who claim to have encountered Skinwalkers. These horrific shapeshifting humanoids can mimic—usually imperfectly—the voices of others, some even changing to look like them completely. They’re usually said to smell like decomposing meat or “blood and copper.” They also aren’t made of gum, mud, or ectoplasm.


A lot of these stories originate from 4chan, usually on /x/ or /k/ (the paranormal and firearms boards, respectively). They’re usually told in the site’s greentexts format. They aren’t exclusive to that site, though; Reddit has an entire subreddit dedicated to Skinwalkers. Some scary story YouTubers also have users submit their supposedly true encounters.


The thing is, none of that aligns with the Navajo legend—not that I know of, anyway. Because of this, encounters with beings like that are usually referred to as “Fleshgaits” (pronounced flesh-gate). However, many still refer to them as Skinwalkers. Exactly why Skinwalkers, of all things, became this huge pop culture phenomenon, I have no idea. I think it got mixed up with other stories, and somehow, forest mimics and Skinwalkers became interchangeable.


If you want a great video on all of this, I highly recommend you check out Sacrow’s video “The Internet’s Corruption of Skinwalkers.” It honestly explains things considerably better than I ever could and is quite eye-opening on the topic as a whole; there’s a lot more in the video that’s explained better than what I said. 


That brings us to this theory; Steve thought that the so-called “Bagodemon” was a Skinwalker. Suffice it to say that sure as hell was not the case. Absolutely nothing in this story aligns with a Skinwalker. Never mind how this thing didn’t even sound human; it’s not even where the Navajo tribe resides. The Navajo Nation is in Arizona, Utah, New Mexico, and Colorado. While yes, there are people of Navajo ancestry outside of those states, Skinwalkers are, to the best of my knowledge, exclusively a Navajo thing. They aren’t flesh-eating monsters who terrorize everyone and everything they see.


So, yeah, this theory doesn’t really have anything to stand on. However, I would be deeply remiss if I didn’t cover what I think Steve intended. So, let’s get into that one.


7. A Fleshgait


A name given to a supposed species of shapeshifting humanoids that reside in deserts, forests, and wherever else you may find humans, Fleshgaits are said to be aggressive, carnivorous beings that love to screw with anyone who dares to enter their territory. They’re often mistakenly referred to as Skinwalkers and Goatmen. Why, exactly, I have no idea; I’m not an Internet historian.


Fleshgaits can mimic voices and take on the appearance of their latest victim. Their mimicry will be imperfect at first, but they can quickly become quite convincing. Their mannerisms, on the other hand, normally leave a lot to be desired. As for why they do this, nobody knows, but it’s likely nothing good.


At least, that’s what the stories online claim. I wrote about these fellows back in 2020, and it desperately needs a rewrite in my eyes; unfortunately, I have numerous other stories that I believe warrant rewrites a lot more. Still, that article goes over some of the basics of what they are; you can also visit the (rather dead) subreddit dedicated to them for more information. Just sort by all-time top posts; there are some posts that will help you get a grasp of them.


That brings us to this theory; it’s more or less what Steve meant when he mentioned Skinwalkers. A bizarre humanoid monstrosity in a forest that was tall, lanky, and malicious in nature. Additionally, the lack of additional sightings can actually be brushed away with this theory since it isn’t abnormal; Fleshgait sightings are wildly inconsistent. Unlike, say, Bigfoot sightings, Fleshgaits don’t have hotspots for a rash of sightings. Not that I know, anyway. Fleshgait sightings just happen wherever, whenever; it’s kind of like my posting schedule. It just happens, and that’s that.


In many ways, the being that Steve saw and Fleshgaits align remarkably well. However, just like anything in this world, it’s not imperfect; there are a handful of discrepancies that really put a damper on it.


The first is the creature’s appearance. In terms of size, it resembles a Fleshgait. However, its appearance isn’t consistent with one. Now granted, Fleshgaits have been described in a few ways; there is no universal look for them. Usually, they’re said to have sunken eyes that are completely black, incredibly thin, and have little to no hair. Basically, imagine The Rake, but with a few strands of hair on its head.


The second is that it didn’t act like one. The modus operandi of a Fleshgait is to lure someone away so it can attack and presumably eat—or maybe absorb—the victim so it can take on their appearance. Whatever it does isn’t known, but the end result is the same: it takes on the guise of whoever it killed. This thing didn’t do that; it screeched loudly before chuckling and leaving.


That brings me to the final difference, and it’s easily the oddest. This thing didn’t move like a Fleshgait. Despite their apparent supernatural capabilities, along with their inhuman speed, I have never heard of one being able to stick to objects like it’s made of bubblegum. I’ve also never heard of one having the ability to launch its limbs like it’s Stretch Armstrong.


These discrepancies are hard to overlook in my eyes, though I suppose you could argue that it’s a different kind of Fleshgait. After all, one can assume that the different environments these beings allegedly inhabit won’t be suited for all of one species; the desert is vastly different from the Arctic tundra and the forests of Tennessee. So, who knows; maybe there’s an incredibly rare, absurd type of Fleshgait in southeastern Texas. Well, assuming they exist at all.


8. The most inbred person in Texas


Through many generations of inbreeding, this one person mutated to have skin that acts like bubblegum. May God have mercy on us all if he ever decides to attack us, for our weapons will be useless against him.


My Take


First of all, I want to say that this story took me way longer than I could have ever imagined; that’s been a recurring theme this month, but this one in particular was especially egregious. I anticipated this would take me, like, a day or so to write; it ended up taking a week and ended up being triple the word length. If I had a dollar for every time a Decemystery entry has had its word count balloon, I would have around ten dollars. I think I could get a candy bar with that much money; I haven’t checked how much they cost nowadays.


Anyway, my little vent session aside, let’s get to my take. I’m not a scholar or historian (I know, a real shocker right there), so I have no idea what legends and stories are prominent in Texas (outside of the Stiltwalkers). However, I’ve never read or heard of anything that sounds like The Bagodemon. Not in the slightest. This is one of the most unique and preposterous things I’ve ever heard of—a claim that I know I’ve said quite a bit, but that feels exceptionally true here.


It’s also a story that I do not believe in the slightest. It would be one thing if this creature had been some weird, lanky humanoid—like a Pale Crawler. Those are by no means a novelty, especially nowadays, given they’ve become synonymous with The Rake, which is one of the most iconic creepypasta characters out there. Had The Bagodemon been that, I’d be inclined to scratch my head. Heck, I’ll let it keep the scythe-like “structures” where its hands should have been. We could chalk it up to an escaped government experiment; I have nothing against a bit of good old conspiratorial fun!


Alas, this story is several bridges too far for me. The fact it can apparently throw its limbs and stick to trees like it’s made of gum, mud, or ectoplasm is nothing short of goofy. It doesn’t sound like something I can rationalize, let alone even properly envision. That, coupled with the complete and total lack of information outside of Steve’s one post, leads me to believe he made the whole thing up.


Now, admittedly, I can’t prove that Steve made this up. In fact, I often avoid labeling something as a hoax since I feel there needs to be something to gain from such a thing. His behavior also didn’t strike me as being like that of a troll. With this, however, I believe it’s all way too silly. If it did happen as Steve described it, then I’d guess that he saw something—like a large bird—and freaked out. I will concede, however, that I don’t know of any bird that sounds like a mix of a pig and a weeping dog, nor do I know of any bird that looks to be made of gum, mud, or ectoplasm. Then again, I’m not an Ornithologist; hell, I know virtually nothing about birds despite having owned a few parakeets in my life.


There is also the matter of no additional sightings; that’s one reason I didn’t include the theory that this was a case of misidentification. There’s also the matter of how Steve explicitly stated that The Bagodemon is a local legend, and I couldn’t find any record of anything by that name online; I figured it would be pointless. I’d just end up talking in circles, repeating the same things over and over. I think I did a rather okay job—at least compared to some other write-ups!


I also don’t like how Steve never followed up with the story of his “hunt” for the creature. The part about the FBI being involved has me highly skeptical, but fine: maybe there were a bunch of reports of something strange, and the local police asked the FBI to assist. That’s not unheard of by any means. However, the fact Steve kept posting after he said he’d get back to covering it, only to go radio silent and never follow up on the whole thing, bothers me to no end. That, to me, screams, “I didn’t have enough creativity to make up a fun story about hunting for a monster.”


I also sincerely doubt that he was strong-armed by the FBI or some shadowy government official because he still managed to get super secret government files on the existence of aliens. Evidently, if the FBI, Men in Black, or some other George W. Bush era fed tried to intimidate him, they did an awful job. Good job, government; you managed to intimidate a person just as effectively as Gary Coleman intimidated me when I played Postal 2!


As a result of all of that, I heavily lean toward this being a hoax. It’s one of those instances where it’s so absurd and so ludicrous that I can’t believe it for a second. Couple that with the lack of answers from Steve, and this whole thing just doesn’t add up to me. It’s like the endless number of “true” stories I’ve seen on 4chan, but without any of the fun or charm—not to mention the ending.


With all of that said, I won’t be completely dismissive of the story—at least, not in a way that would lead me to ignore anyone who tries to prove it. So, if you know of this legend, I’m more than willing to hear you out. All I ask is that you point me in the direction of some kind of documentation (be it a book, another post on the Internet, or something else) because, as far as I can tell, there is none.


On one final note, I wish I knew if the location where Steve saw this thing is a hotspot for Missing 411 reports. While I have reservations about that theory (on account of David Paulides having a rather sketchy reputation—to put it lightly), it’s a random desire I had while writing this; if nothing else, it would have helped to narrow down the list of suspects. Oh well, maybe my research skills are considerably worse than I initially thought; if you have any ideas, feel free to let me know in the comment section.


Conclusion


And so, with that, our story comes to an end. This was definitely one of the more “out there” stories we’ll be covering this month, though it isn’t the most absurd, nor was it the most annoying to write (though it’s up there; this took a long time to finish). I wish that I had more to work with—and trust me, I tried to find something else about it. Unfortunately, it’s yet another one of those instances where it all relates back to one guy and only one guy.


With that said, covering this story did lead me to another place where I can seek out some stories—which is kind of silly since I feel I should have gone to this site before now. I’ve known of it, but for whatever reason, I never bothered to comb through it. Yet another example of my unparalleled intelligence; man, I must have an IQ in the negatives by now!


Oh well, whatever. We may not have gotten any satisfactory answers about The Bagodemon, but that’s how it is sometimes; I can’t do anything to change that. So, until next time, stay happy, stay healthy, and thank you for reading!


2 comments:

  1. I don't know about birds that sound like pigs or crying dogs, but Barn Owls (common across North America) make horrible screeching noises (they're probably the species that one poster meant when they referred to "Screech Owls," which are a different species). I suspect they are responsible for a lot of cryptid sightings since they also look a lot like ghosts, Mothman, and gray aliens...

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    1. Funny you should mention Barn Owls. At some point this year, I was talking to a few friends about them since I found it interesting how alien they look. I can't believe I forgot to mention them in this article.

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