Decemystery (2021) 30: Los Angeles John & Jane Doe (1921–1951)

 

Let’s be honest for a moment: teenagers do some really stupid things. There is absolutely no denying that—it’s kind of a part of being a teen (in my eyes at least). I mean, I did some stupid things. I rebelled against my parents, I acted like I knew everything there was to know, and I thought I could do and say anything I desired without consequences.

That, naturally, backfired, and I learned a lot of harsh lessons.

Lucky for me though, I’ve since learned my lesson (for the most part) and have become a better person. Well, I’ve at least attempted to become a better one. I sure as heck am not perfect by any stretch of the imagination and am still a deeply flawed human being, but I no longer try to pick fights with hornets and light fires inside my own home.

Yes, I actually did the latter one. Admittedly, I did that as a pre-teen, but I thought that fire wouldn’t burn as fast as it actually does.

Err, well, anyways: all of that brings us to today’s story. Teenage tomfoolery/stupidity is the name of the game for today. You see, the Los Angeles John & Jane Doe both made a big oopsy daisy and now have remained unidentified for upwards of a century. Let’s find out why.

Decemystery (2021) Bonus Entry: Who Bought the One Opening Weekend Ticket to See “The Worst Movie Ever!”?

 

Merry Christmas, dear reader! If you don’t celebrate Christmas, fear not! I shall raise a glass of eggnog in your honor.

When I was trying to pick out a bonus entry for today, I was honestly quite stumped. I had a few really, really great ideas, but I couldn’t pick one. They all felt a bit too “mainline entry” for me; I prefer to have the bonus entries be something “out there” and obtuse than worth talking about.

It wasn’t until I was reading about the biggest box office bombs in history that I found a story that I thought fit the bill perfectly. Back in 2011, a film was released called “The Worst Movie Ever!”. It ultimately grossed $25,000 against a budget of $1,100. While technically not a flop by any stretch of the imagination, the film was mentioned because it beat out Zyzzyx Road for the record for “Worst Opening Weekend Ever”.

You see, this movie grossed a meager $11 on its opening weekend; one ticket was sold on the Saturday it premiered. Zyzzyx Road, meanwhile, grossed $30 (though some say it was $20). While that may not seem mysterious, nobody knows who the sole single ticket buyer is (or was). So today, we’re going to ask one simple question and attempt to answer it: Who Bought the One Opening Weekend Ticket to See “The Worst Movie Ever!”?

Decemystery (2021) 18: The Saviors of Doris Smith

I added and removed this story from this year’s schedule so many times, it was like I was playing hot potato with it. It’s not like it’s a controversial or bleak story—quite the opposite in fact. It’s an extremely upbeat and quite fascinating one.

No, the only reason I contemplated not doing it was because I’m an indecisive person who can’t settle on anything until after he’s done writing it. This story just so happened to be at the receiving end of me repeatedly trying to find a replacement story. Alas, I couldn’t think of any and in hindsight, it’s kind of silly of me because it was one of the very first stories I picked out for this year’s Decemystery back in January.

Anyways, just like the mysterious money in Matt and Wendy Jameson’s backyard, today’s story will make us all feel really happy (at least, I think it will). This is the story of the Saviors of Doris Smith.

Decemystery (2021) 13: Ina Jane Doe

 

I’m not going to lie, I have no idea how to do an introduction for this story. I’ve sat here trying out various things, but I always come up thinking it isn’t very attention grabbing. No, I think the only thing that would grab one’s attention is the reconstruction of the woman known as Ina Jane Doe. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t drawn to the story primarily because of said reconstruction, but I digress. Let’s just jump in, because this is a really delightful story. That’s sarcasm by the way.

Decemystery (2021) 6: The Clown in the Woods

Today’s story was one which I really hadn’t planned on doing. You see, unlike the past three years, I wrote this Decemystery completely out of order; I just went with whatever I wanted, picked a date in December, and slapped decided that that was when that story would be posted. So when I got around to this story, it was towards the end of November. Nothing really special there, except for one little thing: the website Snopes had recently done an article on this picture. So I wasn’t entirely sure if I should cover it since, well, I didn’t want to seem like I was hopping on some sort of bandwagon.

Though the more I read over the articles Snopes had done, the more it became apparent that their piece on the topic was very inconclusive. There were a lot of lingering questions on my mind and I decided that I would look into the story for myself. To my surprise, there were some things that they omitted that no other website had talked about. That’s because nearly every other website that had an article on today’s story—which is typically referred to as The Clown in the Woods—didn’t add anything new. Instead, they simply copied and pasted the Snopes article and posted it.

Because of this, I decided that I’d take it upon myself to do some snooping around to see if I could come to any definitive conclusion. Yeah, that’s kind of arrogant of me given that I’m anything but a good researcher—let alone a detective—but I thought that this story could use a more analytical look (especially since it seems that there’s never been anything of that sort done outside of, well, Snopes). So come along, dear reader, it’s time we put on our Sherlock Holmes cap and get to work. This is the story that I like to call “The Clown Who Was Clowning Around in the Woods”.

Decemystery (2021) 2: One-Eyed Jack

Okay, so, funny story about today’s, well, story. It was an unidentified person; I had originally had it written, completed, and ready to be posted. However, as the day drew closer, I began to dislike it more and more. The writing was rushed, it glossed over so many details, and I felt it was rather crude at times. I made a lot of stupid remarks that really made it feel like I didn’t care about what I was writing.

Though that’s probably because I was desperate to write. I wrote most of it when I was on medication that had made it an absolute nightmare to write and I was accepting literally anything I wrote as worthwhile. So, while we might not be covering the story that was intended, I did find a worthwhile replacement. It’s the story of a man known only as One-Eyed Jack. He too is an unidentified person. So come along, dear reader. We’re off to Alaska.

Mystery: Daviess County John Doe (1990)

 

Okay, so, here’s a funny story for you all. Originally, I had planned to write about Septic Tank Sam, the infamous murder victim from Alberta who was tortured, murdered (real shocker there), then disposed of in, well, a septic tank back in 1977. However, as I sat down to prepare for this, I learned he had been identified as 26-year-old Gordon Edwin Sanderson. This took me by surprise since 14 hours prior to this identification, I had told my best friend that he would likely never be identified. So not only did I have to change my plans, but I was also proven wrong and Septic Tank Sam got his name back. Truthfully, I’ve never been happier to be wrong.

At the same time, I was somewhat disappointed I wouldn’t be able to talk about a story like Sam’s. Part of what attracted me to it is I personally think I’ve never really dove into a truly dark, horrific case; something which serves as a sobering reminder to how heartless some people can be. There were a few stories I could fall back on (such as the story of Mary Anderson), but none of them really impacted me the same way that Sam’s story did…

All except for one that is.

As cliché as it is to say there was “just one”, I really do think that Sam’s story was that unique. The amount of suffering he went through prior to his death is shocking to say the least. So I feel it’s really unfortunate there is another story which does affect me the same way Sam’s does. Known as the 1990 Daviess County John Doe, this morbid tale is arguably more unpleasant than Sam’s. So if you’re squeamish, you may find this to be a hard read. For everyone else, let’s take a trip to Kentucky and discuss one of the most (if not the most) violent unidentified persons cases I’ve ever come across.

Decemystery (2020) 24: The Subway Man

Ah, let’s take a trip to “excuse me, but what is this?” land. Yes, we’re going on a happy, magical, wonderful journey to the land where the likes of “Is Lord of the Rings Based on a True Story?” resides in its castle made of sticks, stones, and Pauly Shore movies. Why? Well, today, we’re talking about a story about something called the Subway Man. This barely qualifies as a mystery, but it’s something so inexplicably nonsensical that I want to cover it. Also, I need a break because this month is beginning to make my mental health deteriorate. God, I love Decemystery.

Decemystery (2020) 12: Mount Vernon Jane Doe (1988)

 

There’s something about unidentified murder victims that makes my skin crawl. Never mind how they have no name and their story is as mysterious as can be, but staring at the digital reconstructions sends shivers down my spine. To not know what they may have looked like is something that’s equal parts saddening and unnerving. It’s like you’re staring at someone who has no face.

In the case of today’s story—that of the Mount Vernon Jane Doe—I can’t help but find the story exceptionally saddening. A young woman who was around my age, was tied up, beaten, strangled, and then dumped like trash on the side of a road. Worst of all? This took place not too far from where I live—a little over an hour. While that may seem far to some, I’m someone who’s historically found an hour-long  drive to be nothing. I digress though, let us dive into this sordid tale and see who this young lady was, and who may have taken her life.

Mystery: Paul Deering

It’s been a really, really hellish past month for me; so much so that I cannot go into any reasonable detail without tearing up. The abridged version is that I’ve gone through a ridiculous amount of emotional and mental trauma and stress that’s caused me to take a serious break from writing and admittedly, I should probably not be sitting here writing this story. However, I wanted to have something up on the blog for this month. So let’s stop with the idle chatter and dive into the story of Paul Deering.

Mystery: The Paris Catacombs Video

Today, I want to do something very different. You see, when I go about writing, I tend to try to do my best to cover stories in a way that hasn’t been done before. I believe I’ve failed to do so quite often, but I’ve been extremely happy with how I’ve really gotten a firm grip on a style in recent time.

Though I want to forego that a bit. You see, today’s story is one that’s been covered a fair bit by quite a few people; it’s also been talked about a fair bit. The reason I want to do that is I believe that the footage that’s become known as the Paris Catacombs Video is one that a lot of people tend to overthink and over analyze. So what we’ll be doing today is instead playing the role of the parrot and then playing the role of the armchair detective with five followers on his blog. So without further ado, let’s go spelunking.

Mystery: The Grand Canyon Grim Reaper

I couldn't find the image without the arrow. Sorry.

After the whirlwind of craziness that made up the story of Seth Rich, I felt it was best if today and tomorrow, we focused on a very fun, light-hearted, and down-to-earth mystery. It’s something you may have heard of, especially if you watch—or listen to—a lot of mystery-centric videos/podcasts. It’s little more than a photo (which serves as the header image for this write-up) and shows a man at the edge of the Grand Canyon with a fishing line. However, if you look a little closer, there’s something deeply unusual about it all: a man peeking around from behind a bush. This man has garnered the nickname of the Grand Canyon Grim Reaper. Edgy name, but is it really Death himself? Let’s find out.

Mystery: The Man in the Plastic Bag

This has to be one of the most random things I’ve ever encountered on any website dedicated to mysteries, legends, or anything of that sort. On the ObscUrban Legend Wiki, there’s a story related to something called the Man in the Plastic Bag. I’d intended to cover it last year for Decemystery, but I honestly found it to not be worthwhile material. However, because I want to have fun and cover some of the simpler things I’ve amassed, I’m going to cover it for you all today.

Mystery: The Self-Immolator From Hiper-Bompreço

A photo of the Hiper-Bompreço mall.

There were two things I wanted to do this month in the way of the stories I picked. The first was that I wanted a fair bit of diversity in the locations we went to to discuss the mysteries. I've never quite liked how little I've focused on cryptids and enigmas from continents like Asia and Australia (which I'll say right now: it got the short end of the stick badly this time around). I've primarily focused on stories in North America and Europe. As such, I made sure to get a fair number of stories from South America, Africa, and Asia. The second thing I wanted was for the stories to be really, really weird. I wanted stories I could really cut loose on and be less restrained by the chains of professionalism.

Doing that wasn't difficult whatsoever. The Obscurban Legend wiki was there to help me pick out a fair number of the entries. The first of them is short, sweet, and really weird. It's called the Self-Immolator of Hiper-Bompreço. To call this any other than the epitome of what I wanted this month to primarily be would be a federal crime. So let's dive in!

Decemystery (2019) 3: Ulster County John Doe (1988)

The man in question.

This story is one that I only recently discovered. On the surface, there’s nothing too special about it. After all, there are thousands of John and Jane Doe’s waiting to be identified. What makes this story special—in my eyes at least—is the photo that was found in this particular individuals possession. A seemingly happy man holding a young child. Ever since I saw the photo, I’ve been wondering to myself: who is the Ulster County John Doe?

Mystery: Jerome of Sandy Cove

Brief preface: I dedicate this blog entry to my friend The Bricklayer. Happy birthday, Brick!

Now then: every now and then, there comes a story that reads more like a short story rather than a real mystery. The Man from Taured is a great example of this: a story passed around decades after it happened and no mention of the incident prior to that.

But while that mystery may be more firmly rooted in myth than reality, the world is filled with many unidentified individuals; the United States having as many as 40,000 according to Wikipedia. Some of who are later definitively identified and their stories finally closed. Those that aren't are typically the victims of foul play, their bodies either too badly decomposed for positive identification or nobody coming forward to identify the body as a friend, acquaintance, or loved one.

Then there are stories like Jerome of Sandy Cove. A story that reads more like The Man from Taured, only it's verifiable it happened.

Mystery: The Man from Taured

*Looks at Butterfly* Is this Taured?

Reading like the start to a science-fiction novel, The Man from Taured is a brilliant tale that's somehow not a work of fiction. It happened, though exactly what the reality behind it is ranges from the outlandishly fantastical to the completely mundane.

Decemystery 14: The Phantom Whistler of Lousiana

A portion of a newspaper article on the spooky whistler.

Ah, Louisiana. A place of culture and spirit. The home of Mardi Gras and The Big Easy. Beneath its cultural flare however, Louisiana has had a pretty rough history. Back in the 1910s, the state's most famous city—New Orleans—was terrorized by an axe wielding maniac who became known as “The Axeman of New Orleans”. That’s a story for another day though. For now, we’re taking a trip thirty years beyond that into the swell year of 1950. The Cold War was going on, the swell nature of the neighborhood was at an all-time high, and the Civil Rights movement was at the forefront of the news whenever the Soviet Union wasn’t threatening to nuke us into oblivion.

However, within the confines of Paradis, there was a little story that was about to be birthed. One that to this day remains a little gem in the cavalcade of unsolved mysteries. It is simply known as The Phantom Whistler of Louisiana.

Decemystery 7: The Boy in the Box

This case is the one that really got me into unsolved mysteries after many years of not having read about them. I can't say for certain what it was that intrigued me. What I can say for certain is that the photo of the Boy in the Box is one of the most unsettling photos I've ever seen and that I'm going to share it with you now to give you nightmares and/or break your heart.

This image has haunted me for years. I can't say for certain why, but it's always made me uneasy.

Decemystery 6: The Isdal Woman

Who are you?

There are no doubt more than a few unsolved murders that could be explained as Cold War espionage—and we'll be covering two with this miniseries. The first of those is probably the more blatantly obvious and less known of the two: the Isdal Woman.