Decemystery (2024) 23: The 2006 Fort Pierce Alien Abduction

 

Once upon a time, there lived a doe-eyed lad who enjoyed UFOs and all things associated with them. He’d go to the library and borrow tons of books related to UFO sightings, the Roswell Incident, and Area 51. He’d read them over and over and would watch all sorts of specials on UFOs and the fantastical theories surrounding them.

As time went on, the lad came to love the stories so much that he would tell his friends and family about them. His friends weren’t as interested in the topics; they were more interested in sports. The lad’s family, meanwhile, liked that he’d found something he enjoyed oh so much.

That lad was me, Vertigo, the fellow who operates this blog. After growing up loving anything and everything related to the unknown and mysterious, I am now living my dream of writing about it. Well, I’m living it when my mental health isn’t restricting me to staring at my Android screen while time ticks by.

Ah, but I’m not here to dwell on my personal struggles; I’ve done that more than enough throughout this month. No, I’m here, once again, to mention just how much I love the topics that I write about. I’ve made it no secret that I relished reading and watching everything I could about cryptids, ghosts, UFOs, and more. While the topic of ghosts has become one of my lesser favorites as time has gone on, the others have remained at the forefront of my mind.

The subject of UFOs is probably the one that I enjoy thinking about the most. The idea that we’re alone in the universe is as terrifying as it is bizarre. It’s also fascinating to wonder what they may think of our humble blue planet. Too bad they won’t respond to our calls. Someone’s got to be home! Right?

Oh well, the topic of extraterrestrial life deserves its own write-up one day—preferably when I have a year or two to write it and finely craft it from the ground up. For now, I’ve got individual reports from people who have seen UFOs and aliens—and in some cases, reports where they’ve even made contact with the extraterrestrials!

That said, I’m not missing anything, am I? Nah, that’s crazy. How could I possibly forget anything? It’s not like I haven’t repeated myself nonstop about how human memory is fallible and unreliable.

Oh, wait, I’m wrong on both fronts. My memory sucks. Also, I’m forgetting alien abductions.

Indeed, while I may be rather outspoken about my doubts regarding alien abductions as an adult, I was fascinated by them as a child. I’m not sure if this contradicts what my past self said, but I’ll gladly correct the record. There was a part of me that was intrigued by the story of Betty and Barney Hill as a child. I always wondered what happened to them and if they were truly the victims of an alien abduction.

I don’t remember when my views on the subject changed. If I had to guess, I’d say that it was a few years back. The seeds of doubt were always there, but something finally reaped them, and I’ve become increasingly doubtful of the legitimacy of most abduction claims.

I digress, though. What does this have to do with today’s write-up? Well, if you’ve been keeping up with Decemystery 2024, you’ll remember that last Tuesday, I said that I’d be covering two cases related to alien abductions. Today, we’ll be discussing the second one. Like last time, I want to see if this story can throw me for a loop and make me wonder if maybe, just maybe, my stance on alien abductions isn’t correct.

I don’t see any reason to delay any further, so come along, dear reader; let’s take a trip down to Florida and investigate The 2006 Fort Pierce Alien Abduction. I really need to think of better names for alien abduction stories. Eh, maybe next year. For now, I want to focus on seeing if this will be the alien abduction case that changes my outlook on the matter at hand.

Decemystery (2024) 18: One Man’s Conversation with a Cat

 

This write-up is dedicated to a very dear friend of mine. You know who you are!

Once upon a time, I was a bright-eyed, idealistic guy who had dreams and aspirations. Then, the tsunami called “life” came along and washed them all away. This is why I now vehemently dislike idealism and believe that people are better off learning early on that the world’s a rough place and viewed the same way you’d view a lion—terrifying.

Lucky for me, the one thing that the tsunami didn’t sweep away was my optimism. I’ve always maintained a fair amount of it, and I’ve made sure never to lose it. It’s an important piece of my younger self that I cling to for dear life.

That said, for a while, my optimism was really close to evaporating when it came to my writing. The reason for that? Well, when I looked at my family—be they immediate or extended—I often looked at myself and questioned what road I took a detour on.

For context, my family has a history in the military and law (be it law enforcement or lawyering). To call me a black sheep would be quite an understatement; I’m about as far detached from them when it comes to careers and jobs as you can get. Whereas they took up noble occupations, I’m sitting on my bed writing about how people saw a giant spider on the moon.

This, in turn, would make me feel vastly inferior to them. I suppose that’s a given; I’m writing about some of the weirdest stuff I find while combing the Internet. I’m not exactly Robert Kardashian, but I still wished I had more to show for my life than a blog that people visit on occasion.

Lucky for me, in recent times, I’ve come to embrace that black sheep status. My family has supported me, and they love that I’ve pursued a more niche and obtuse path in life than following in the footsteps of everyone else. So, all’s well and good.

Now, what does any of this have to do with today’s story? Well, as we draw ever closer to the end of Decemystery, I want the stories to get weirder; I want them to become so brain-meltingly absurd that you’ll take a look at the title and go, “Oh, Vertigo made this up.” But, deep down, you’ll know I didn’t.

I feel like if I’m going to embrace the topics I’ve fallen in love with, I need to make the second half of this month near-total chaos; I need this Decemystery to end off on a note so crazy that every day will be akin to the wildest roller coaster imaginable! So, to begin that, let’s talk about One Man’s Conversation with a Cat.

Decemystery (2024) 12: The UFOs High Above Artjärvi!

 

In the past, I’ve talked about how much I love my friends. This love hasn’t changed while I’ve been absent from writing; if anything, my love for them has only grown because they’ve supported me through the numerous hardships I’ve endured. Likewise, I’ve done my best to help them out—even if it’s through simple gestures.

Writing articles dedicated to my friends is one of those simple gestures. While it may be a bit self-indulgent since I can’t guarantee it’ll make them happy, I do like to think that offering them something to read can help take their mind off of simple troubles, whether it be stress from college, work, or anything else of that nature. If nothing else, it’s the perfect reason for me to stop procrastinating!

Last year, a few of the Decemystery duology entries were dedicated to friends. One of them was for a Finnish friend of mine, Nea, whom I’m very close to. Initially, I wasn’t sure if I’d cover another one for her—or any other friends, for that matter. However, given the worry that she, along with my other friends, expressed during struggles I had earlier in the year with my bipolar, I figured it’d be rude of me not to do something for them.

So, when I was piecing this year’s Decemystery back together, I opted not only to dedicate another story to her but also picked out a few other cases that I knew would make my closest friends happy. Most of those friends are from one collective group, though, so the story dedicated to them will come much later in the month (much like last year).

Anyway, let’s get to today’s story. Well, if you read the title, you know what to expect. It’s time for more UFO goodness; I can’t help but have a sweet tooth for these stories. While some may be frustrating (like the one I went over the day before yesterday), so many of them provide me with a wonderful amount of material to work with…

And then there’s today’s story.

This is a head-scratcher of a case. I can’t quite put into words what it is, but this sounds like more than a UFO sighting without it ever becoming more than one. It’s practically one sentence away from being an alien abduction story—one that’s simultaneously told from the perspective of someone who witnessed an alien abduction and was abducted by aliens.

But, hey, don’t take my word for it; I’ll showcase it to you myself. Grab your passport, and let’s take a trip over to Finland, dear reader! It’s time to dive into the story of The UFOs High Above Artjärvi! Why’d I add an exclamation point to today’s write-up? Because I felt like it, that’s why!

Decemystery (2023) 4: The Bagodemon

 

When I was growing up, there was a plot of land across the street from me with a small touch of woods near it. I remember exploring them a bit as a kid and thinking it was the coolest thing in the world. I never found much of anything interesting, barring snakes and a small mound with rocks that, in hindsight, looked like a makeshift grave. It wasn’t, but I remember me and a few friends pretending it was. We were stupid—and I know, at the very least, that hasn’t changed on my end.

While there weren’t any scary monsters or abandoned cabins in the woods where I lived, I still hold some fond memories of aimlessly wandering around. One day, I will find myself a scary monster or abandoned cabin, though. For now, I live vicariously through weird stories I find on the Internet. It’s a lot less exciting than it sounds, but it’s better than nothing!

That brings us to today’s Decemystery 2023 entry. It’s a tale from the great state of Texas known only as The Bagodemon. It’s one that I had never heard of up until I found it, a theme that will be quite common throughout this month. So come along, dear reader, and let’s see what secrets the woods of Lone Star State hold!

Movie Review: Chaos (2005) (NSFL)

 

Before I get started on this review, I want to make two things very clear. The first is that there will be spoilers for the entire movie. So if you, for whatever reason, have the intention of watching Chaos for yourself, do be warned. The second thing is that those spoilers are wildly NSFL, so if you have a weak stomach or simply don’t desire to have your day involve gratuitous violence, gore, torture, and/or rape: you may want to gloss over this review. No, I won’t be making an SFW version of this review because, simply put, that would be a few words long and nothing more. I sadly don’t think that would even be worth posting as a joke either since, well, this movie does have a history with it (to an extent). Anyways: for everyone else, let’s begin the little introduction to this dumpster fire of a movie.

Chaos was a movie that’s been on my radar since I was a young teen. I own a book written by Roger Ebert called Your Movie Sucks. It’s a great book and compiles all of the movies that Ebert truly disliked. In the preface, Ebert makes note of a back-and-forth he got into with this movie’s director, a man by the name of David DeFalco. DeFalco was a wrestler, and why he became a director is beyond me, but that’s besides the point. What is the point is that DeFalco didn’t take kindly to Ebert’s ridiculously scathing review of Chaos. If you want to read about it yourself, just click here to read the section on Wikipedia.

Anyways, it was because of this that I always had a bit of interest in watching this movie. I knew of the really shocking, awful elements involved and as a result: I did admittedly go into this knowing that the movie was going to try to appall me in every possible way it could. Not that I think it matters too much given the post boasts that it is the “most brutal movie ever made”. More on that in a bit because woo boy is that title unearned.

Getting back to the whole “curiosity” aspect: I’d contemplated watching the movie for a few years now. I was going to view it last month, but because of Decemystery 2021, I thought it would be a bad idea to watch a movie when I was in the middle of writing about, well, mysteries. Then, last night, I decided to finally do so; I’d been telling him about how the movie is the second lowest rated film on Metacritic, just narrowly being beaten by Dinesh D’Souza's Death of a Nation, and I contemplated if it was truly worthy of being dethroned by it. As a result, that was finally the kick in the rear I needed to watch it…

Boy, I really wish I hadn’t bothered. This movie is certainly worthy of the notoriety it’s gotten. Though not for every reason it’s earned it. Come along, dear reader/moviegoer, it’s time to talk about David DeFalco’s Chaos.

Decemystery (2019) 1: Golf Rumors

I had scrapped the idea for Decemystery 2019 a few weeks ago. I had intended to just offset the workload to March/May so I could get together something extremely special and exciting. Yet, I didn't want to nix what I hope to be a yearly thing. Something that makes the end of the year special and fun 

So I wondered what I could do. It admittedly didn't take long to settle on covering mostly extremely weird, quirky, silly mysteries and a few conspiracies. To top it all off, a few truly horrible, maddeningly evil tales. So while this go around may not have the same vibe as last year—instead featuring primarily outlandish, goofy tales—there is still going to be plenty of fun to be had. This is, of course, merely in my eyes. For all I know, you won't agree.

Anyways, let's get to the first story. This one is the sister entry to the write-up I did in the 2006 Volleyball Incident and is the primary reason I resurrected this year's Decemystery. It's a story that's as vague as it is fascinating. Let me introduce you it to via a description from a now archived 4chan thread.

They also hunt down anyone [people who look into Golf Rumors] religiously.

Such a warning like this is something that would no doubt put off anyone who expresses interest. The story of what’s come to be known as Golf Rumors is one that descends into that oh-so lovely rabbit hole of Satanic rituals and all sorts of other occult-based claims. It’s the type of stuff that makes up any New World Order/Illuminati conspiracy you can find on the internet.

What makes this one more fantastical is how it allegedly has been scrubbed from the surface web. It is, for all intents and purposes, a story that's worthy of being seen by the eyes of those who dare to go to the deepest parts of the deep web.

Or so they say. We won't know unless we go on a journey to discover the truth. So let's begin.