Decemystery (2022.3) 17: The Brooklyn Subway Vampire Girl

Growing up, I was never a big fan of vampires. I always preferred werewolves. Indeed, for whatever reason, I never found vampires particularly interesting or terrifying. Despite that, I vividly recall having one God-awful nightmare when I was younger about a vampire outside my living room window trying to get in. It had the most inhuman look on its face, and it scares me to this day. If I had the ability to draw, I would have no trouble recreating the look on that thing’s face. With that said, that nightmare is an exception; beyond that, I just don’t find vampires to be frightening.

Nevertheless, like plenty of other things, I still enjoy reading about them. So, when I came across the story of The Brooklyn Subway Vampire Girl, my interest was immediately piqued. It’s a story from a major metropolitan area that I’ve visited quite often, and it involves a vampire. That’s definitely something that I definitely would not expect to hear about in a place like New York City. So, come along, dear reader; it’s time for us to go vampire hunting!

Decemystery (2022.3) 16: Emerald Island

 

Picturesque, calm, and surrounded by water, islands are depicted as the ideal retirement spot in a lot of media. Personally, as much as I love the sea, I wouldn’t want to live somewhere where a bad storm could have me become food for a shark, but that’s just me.

There are an estimated 900,000 islands on Earth, and, as it stands, the odds of there being an undiscovered one are slim. There could be a few submerged, however, and that is the perfect lead-in to today’s story. I know, sudden, but I don’t feel like rambling about remote landmasses for five paragraphs.

It’s been a long time since I’ve covered a phantom island; the last one I covered was all the way back in 2020 when I went over the Terra Nova Islands. I’ve wanted to talk about another one of these enigmas for a couple of years now, but for one reason or another, I nixed it from my schedule. Today, however, we’ll be taking a trip down to Antarctica once more to talk about these—and it’s one with a pretty name: Emerald Island. Let the expedition begin!

Decemystery (2021) 30: Los Angeles John & Jane Doe (1921–1951)

 

Let’s be honest for a moment: teenagers do some really stupid things. There is absolutely no denying that—it’s kind of a part of being a teen (in my eyes at least). I mean, I did some stupid things. I rebelled against my parents, I acted like I knew everything there was to know, and I thought I could do and say anything I desired without consequences.

That, naturally, backfired, and I learned a lot of harsh lessons.

Lucky for me though, I’ve since learned my lesson (for the most part) and have become a better person. Well, I’ve at least attempted to become a better one. I sure as heck am not perfect by any stretch of the imagination and am still a deeply flawed human being, but I no longer try to pick fights with hornets and light fires inside my own home.

Yes, I actually did the latter one. Admittedly, I did that as a pre-teen, but I thought that fire wouldn’t burn as fast as it actually does.

Err, well, anyways: all of that brings us to today’s story. Teenage tomfoolery/stupidity is the name of the game for today. You see, the Los Angeles John & Jane Doe both made a big oopsy daisy and now have remained unidentified for upwards of a century. Let’s find out why.

Decemystery (2021) Bonus Entry: Who Bought the One Opening Weekend Ticket to See “The Worst Movie Ever!”?

 

Merry Christmas, dear reader! If you don’t celebrate Christmas, fear not! I shall raise a glass of eggnog in your honor.

When I was trying to pick out a bonus entry for today, I was honestly quite stumped. I had a few really, really great ideas, but I couldn’t pick one. They all felt a bit too “mainline entry” for me; I prefer to have the bonus entries be something “out there” and obtuse than worth talking about.

It wasn’t until I was reading about the biggest box office bombs in history that I found a story that I thought fit the bill perfectly. Back in 2011, a film was released called “The Worst Movie Ever!”. It ultimately grossed $25,000 against a budget of $1,100. While technically not a flop by any stretch of the imagination, the film was mentioned because it beat out Zyzzyx Road for the record for “Worst Opening Weekend Ever”.

You see, this movie grossed a meager $11 on its opening weekend; one ticket was sold on the Saturday it premiered. Zyzzyx Road, meanwhile, grossed $30 (though some say it was $20). While that may not seem mysterious, nobody knows who the sole single ticket buyer is (or was). So today, we’re going to ask one simple question and attempt to answer it: Who Bought the One Opening Weekend Ticket to See “The Worst Movie Ever!”?

Decemystery (2021) 23: The Signal of Isla Han Samar

Today’s story is yet another one from the Forteana Map. It, much like the story of the “Elevator Riddle”, has virtually nothing on it. However, I opted to still cover it for two reasons. The first is that I wanted something else that was rather easy to cover (I stand by the excuse I gave when talking about the Elevator Riddle: I’ve had a rough year, please cut me a break). The second is that it doesn’t appear that anyone—not even Dead Rabbit Radio—has talked about this story. So, I figured it could be fun to be the first person to cover it.

At least, I believe I’m the first person to have covered it. If I’m not, I feel silly for missing whoever did. They didn’t appear in either Google or Bing’s search results, no matter how many times I tried to look up information on this story.

Ah, but I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s start from the beginning. This is the story of the Signal of Isla Han Samar.

Decemystery (2021) 18: The Saviors of Doris Smith

I added and removed this story from this year’s schedule so many times, it was like I was playing hot potato with it. It’s not like it’s a controversial or bleak story—quite the opposite in fact. It’s an extremely upbeat and quite fascinating one.

No, the only reason I contemplated not doing it was because I’m an indecisive person who can’t settle on anything until after he’s done writing it. This story just so happened to be at the receiving end of me repeatedly trying to find a replacement story. Alas, I couldn’t think of any and in hindsight, it’s kind of silly of me because it was one of the very first stories I picked out for this year’s Decemystery back in January.

Anyways, just like the mysterious money in Matt and Wendy Jameson’s backyard, today’s story will make us all feel really happy (at least, I think it will). This is the story of the Saviors of Doris Smith.

Decemystery (2021) 12: The Elevator Riddle

Obscurity is something that I believe has gotten me the most microscopic level of fame. Sometimes, when I look up certain stories I’ve written about, I notice that my blog is either the top search result, or on the first page. It always fills me with happiness. However, at the same time, I feel kind of weird about it. I tend to not think of myself as anyone special, and I often just parrot a lot of what I see written on other websites.

Still, the level of joy outweighs that thought—and it’s a very, very, very minor reason why I wanted to cover today’s tale. Known as the Elevator Riddle, this is a story that… honestly doesn’t really feel like it can be properly described in any meaningful way. So let’s just jump right into it.

Decemystery (2021) 9: The Flying Mist Mattress

Every now and then, I find it really fun to pick something out that’s really weird to cover. I’m pretty sure I’ve said that before, but I don’t care: it’s good to always remind people (and to tell newcomers to this blog). So for today, I want to cover something I found that’s called the Flying Mist Mattress. No real introduction needed; I think the name speaks for itself.

Decemystery (2021) 5: The Disappearance of Ellen Patricia Bresch

 

Author's Note: a family member of Ellen's left a comment on February 4, 2024, regarding her husband's death. In the write-up, I said that his cause of death was unknown; as it turns out, he passed away due to diabetes. I thought I would clear that up here, rather than leave it unaddressed, unless you read the comments.

Ah, true crime. It’s my favorite thing—at least next to consuming product and getting excited for next products. It’s a really fascinating world to dive into, especially when you find something really obscure. Coincidentally, that’s exactly what today’s story is: something obscure and, as far as I can tell, not really talked about anywhere big. It’s about a woman named Ellen Patricia Bresch. A seemingly ordinary woman who made one really unordinary move prior to disappearing. So come along, dear reader, it’s time for us to take a trip to Kentucky and see what happened on one fateful night.

Mystery: Az’-i-wû-gûm Ki-mukh’-ti

 

Once upon a time, there was a website called Mystery Archive. I wrote a whopping two articles there, and one is now lost to time. It was the one I wish I could’ve found, but the Internet Archive doesn’t have the page and I am very sad. Lucky for me, I could find this one! So, due to that website appearing to be dead, I will now post it here. Woo-hoo!

Salutations, dear reader. Tell me: are you a believer in the unknown? I know I am. I love to read about cryptids of all types: Sasquatch, Nessie, Mothman, and the reason that gas prices are obscene. However, those creatures are normal; they’re simplistic in their appearance and in their names.

Indeed, cryptids can have some funny names. Whether it’s the Nyagwaiheogwa (Naked Bear) from upstate New York or the ten-legged Qupqugiaq, there’s more than a few creatures that have names that can—and most likely will—make you do a double take.

One of those creatures with funny names is the focus of today’s story. It’s known as the Az’-i-wû-gûm Ki-mukh’-ti. If you’re wondering how to pronounce that, then so am I. Though if you ask me: I don’t think pronunciation is all that important. After all, we must first discover what this creature is and that’s why I’m writing about it. So let’s grab some snow gear and head to Greenland and Alaska!

Mystery: The Murder of Alain Bouzeida

This story is dedicated to my father, whose birthday is today. Happy birthday, old man. <3

I dunno about you, but I think that every village/town/city has “that guy”. The person who’s seen as a troublemaker, or at the very least isn’t very well-liked by the community. Maybe they’re a drug dealer, maybe they’re a raging alcoholic who tries to pick fights with everyone, or maybe they’re just generally shady and there are shifty individuals who go in and out of their home. Heck, maybe “that guy” is just a bit on the weird side.

Whatever the case may be, there’s usually at least one person who’s like that. Today’s story is one which centers on someone like that; it’s a showcasing of how every community can always have one person who people just don’t like. However, the person here isn’t one who was misunderstood. No, they were… actually kind of a dick.

Before we get to who our central focus is, I want to just say that I’ve only ever seen this story covered by the YouTube channel “Criminally Listed”, back in February of this year to be exact. While I try to steer clear of covering something/someone that a much bigger, much more popular content creator has gone over, this was a story which I couldn’t help but showcase. It’s one of the weirdest and most random murders I’ve ever seen in my life. So let’s go over the murder of Alain Bouzeida.

Mystery: The Antarctic Godzilla

 

Let’s take a trip back to the middle of 2019. I’d just lost my girlfriend because of a gnarly break up, I was lonely, but I still had World of Warcraft to play. All was technically okay, except it totally wasn’t. Lucky for me though, I had an ace up my sleeve: writing. That’s why throughout most of 2019, I didn’t write a dang thing. However, I did have a plethora of ideas, one of which is the center of today’s story.

You see, back in 2019, I had been looking into these things called “Ningens”, which were reported by Japanese sailors. They’re basically aquatic humans that live in the Antarctic sea and are said to be really dang big (well over 10 feet/3 meters). If you want to know more, I did a rather short write-up on them for 2019’s Decemystery. It’s minimalistic, but I think it gets the point across somewhat well.

Anyways, while doing research on the Ningen, I came across another story which not only was reported by Japanese sailors, but also happens to take place in Antarctica. It’s called the Antarctic Godzilla, and it was originally slated to be covered during Decemystery 2019….

Then Decemystery 2020.

Then in this year’s Decemystery.

Finally, I decided to cover it today, because there’s honestly next to nothing in the way of information when it comes to this story. So let’s dive into this whale of a tale and see what the truth behind it is.

Spoiler: it isn’t actually Godzilla.

A Kinda-Sorta Midyear Update (Because I'm Bad At Keeping Promises)

 

Hello there, dear reader. Welcome back to my blog—which has been as active as a sloth is. I did say at the end of last month that I was working on something, and I am! It’s nearly complete, but I want to make an announcement first. It’s both about the write-up and about what’s in store for the rest of the year. So, click the jump button so you know what’s going on!

Video Game Review: Raid: Shadow Legends

Why hello there, dear reader. Welcome back to my blog; so great of you to be sticking around with me. I have been absent for a while now and there is a reason for that. To put it simply: I’ve been going through a great deal of mental health related troubles related to my bipolar. It’s gotten so bad that I’m contemplating checking myself into a hospital for quick and immediate care. However, before I do that, I’m looking into a therapist. Whichever ends up being the course of action, I’ll let you know in a future update.

In-between all of this though, I have written a little bit of my megalist (which I now have no idea when it will be finished) and been checking out mobile games to kill the little waking time that I have (I’ve been sleeping a great deal). One of these is a notorious game that I’m sure a great many of you are familiar with: Raid: Shadow Legends. It was—and I guess still is—all over the Internet, especially YouTube. A great many influencers were paid quite well to promote it and say how it’s the most incredible mobile RPG on the market, though is it really?

To some: it isn’t a bad game. To others, it’s terrible. I decided I’d take a gander myself and see what all of the hubbub was. So come along, dear reader! Let’s take a dive into the world of Raid: Shadow Legends!

Movie Review: The Banana Splits Movie

 

Before we begin, I’d like to begin by saying that I’m sorry for the lack of any content. I ended up getting very sidetracked with other things related to real life, so I haven’t paid much attention here. However, I’m pleased to say that the first big write-up on this blog will be a new megalist! So, woo! I’ll also be posting more reviews like I said I would, starting with today’s story.

If you or a family member (or a friend’s family member) grew up in the 1960s, or you grew up watching Boomerang like me, you likely know of a show called “The Banana Splits Adventure Hour”. If you don’t, it was a show featuring four “funny animal characters” named Fleagle (a dog), Bingo (an ape), Drooper (a lion), and Snorky (an elephant). These four characters made up a fictional rock band called “The Banana Splits”. In the show, the Splits generally performed a variety of skits, played their instruments, and did other things one would expect from the late 1960s. Well, at least within the realm of legality, though I imagine Hanna-Barbara were one some strong LSD when they greenlit this show.

The show lasted for a grand total of 31 episodes, though there were some shorts too. Since the show aired, it’s garnered a cult following (I guess), though in the time I watched it—which is to say I watched it while feeling unnerved by the costumes—I never found it to be particularly noteworthy. The costumes are nifty, but the show itself isn’t the strongest of the creations from Hanna-Barbara. Though the theme song is one of the most infectious and catchy I’ve ever heard.

Tra la la tra la la la

Anyways, in spite of my criticism towards the show, I need to be fair. The show was popular enough to earn a TV film, some educational films, a 2008 revival (which floundered I think), After that though, there wasn’t anything on it; the show remained one of the many intellectual properties that saw no interest—until 2019. It was in that year that, at San Diego Comic-Con, a horror-comedy film was announced. It was met with laughter and statements that it looked terrible. Though is it really? Ehh, kinda. Let’s go over the specifics though—with minimal spoilers.

Decemystery (2020) 31: N.U.G.E.T.

 

Welcome to the capstone story for this year’s Decemystery, dear reader. I wanted to make it a story that you would never forget. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find the time or energy to do the original story. That’s okay though because I’ll get to it early next year if I’m not dead from COVID-19. Also, I found an equally fascinating story. It’s another tale from the Conspiracy Iceberg and it’s a heck of a trip.

N.U.G.E.T. is a story that really piqued my interest because of its name. With an enigmatic tale like that, you’d immediately suspect something tied to espionage. Interestingly, it included it—kind of. While the details on this story are limited, there’s enough that it doesn’t end up a hazy mess like the Mariana Trench Bone Pit. So let’s take a little dive into this story and see what the truth is.

Decemystery (2020) 30: The Mariana Trench Bone Pit

 

When I wrote about the Mariana Trench Sea Serpent, I said that I hoped to get to this story next year. Well, I decided against that and have instead opted to cover it now. So let’s head back to the world famous deepest known part of the ocean and talk about the Mariana Trench Bone Pit.

Decemystery (2020) 28: Rose Eater

Hello once more, dear reader. The final few stories for Decemystery are going to be a bit unique. You see, I’m feeling very sick and sadly, due to this year having been what it is, I don’t have the energy to write up something lengthy; that’s why this year’s Decemystery has largely been filled with shorter-than-average write-ups. However, for the final four, I sadly feel it’s best if we take it nice, slow, and easy. So, for the first of the final four, I want to break the rule I set at the start of the month and cover a conspiracy. I know, that’s really cheap of me, but they’re one of the easiest things I can do when I feel like I’m going to die. So, to start things off, let’s talk about Rose Eater.

Decemystery (2020) 26: Old Spider Legs

Hey, remember yesterday how I mentioned something called Old Spider Legs? Well, today, we’re gonna take some time to go ahead and talk about it!

Decemystery (2020) Bonus Entry: Czechoslovakia Dong Wrangler

Merry Christmas, dear reader! I hope you’ve had a wonderful, happy day and that you got everything you wanted for Christmas. Me, personally, I got a copy of Dune and some other wonderful things. It’s been a happy, awesome day and I wish to end it off on a note that will forever be remembered as one of the most ridiculously funny things you’ll ever read. So, without further ado, let’s talk about… uh… the Czechoslovakian Dong Wrangler.