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Monday, October 26, 2020

Mystery: The Laptop From Hell


Politics: it’s a minefield where mudslinging is norm and fanaticism is an inevitability for any strongman who wants to boast about how he’ll bring about change. Here in the United States, I ponder how on God’s green Earth we’ve gotten to where we are now. Then I remember that this country was built upon fighting our fellow man and sit back as people outside throw Molotov Cocktails at each other. Good times, good times.

Indeed, in recent times, American politics has become a hotbed for a second civil war. The left-wing (or center-right in the eyes of some) Democratic Party and the right-wing (or far-right in the eyes of those who see Democrats as center-right) Republican Party have been at each other’s throats. Democratic Congressmen such as Adam Bennett Schiff, Nancy Patricia Pelosi (who currently serves as Speaker of the House of Representatives), Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and Ilhan Abdullahi Omar are all seen as demons in the eyes of many conservative Republicans.

On the opposite of the spectrum, Senate Majority Leader Addison Mitchell “Mitch” McConnell, President Donald John Trump, Congressman Devin Gerald Nunes, and Political Commentator Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson are all seen as traitors and general dickheads by the liberal Democrats. Such accusations are also thrown by Republicans towards the Democrats I mentioned above as a side note; nothing is off-limits when it comes to labels hurled against the opposition party. There have been murders, attempted murders, attempted kidnappings, and just about everything else one can imagine that hasn’t escalated into a full-blown days-long gunfight.

Such tension is inevitably going to hit a point when a gunfight like that does break out though—but we aren’t here to speculate on that (though who knows, maybe we will down the line). Politics is, however, the name of the game today and with that, I felt it was necessary to give a background to what sort of chaos we’ll be looking at in this write-up. So what exactly is today’s story? Well, it’s one that’s going to be something much, much different from my usual back of tricks. We’ll be taking a look at an on-going story; one that only recently emerged. It’s a highly controversial—heck, I’d call it volatile—one that’s almost certain to get me a great deal of flack from many people (particularly acquaintances of mine). It's a story known as the laptop from hell, though I’m sure that most Americans will know it as Hunter Biden’s laptop.

Now, before I even get into the story, I want to stress something—and I desperately want you, dear reader, to keep it in mind. Given that this story’s ongoing and still developing, I want you to treat this write-up as nothing more than me conveying what I’ve read and know about the story to you. If you’re a Democrat, this is not going to be a debunking of the story. If you’re a Republican or a Q follower, this isn’t going to be something to fuel your confirmation bias. It’s merely me telling you what I’ve read, what I’ve heard, and what I know. So treat it as a write-up filled with hearsay; it’s built upon the foundation of the rumor mill and nothing more.

On one final note: I’d like to address why I want to cover this. Simply put: the United States’ 2020 Federal Election is next Tuesday and I think that it’d be fascinating to take a look at how this cycle has culminated in what’s arguably one of the wildest stories I’ve ever read in my 24 years on this planet. So come along, dear reader. We’re going to take a look at what some claim is one of the biggest political scandals in American history.

Wednesday, October 21, 2020

Mystery: Hollywood Anon


Under any normal circumstances, I would begin this introduction with a very light-hearted, tongue-in-cheek “hi, dear reader” style. Though in the case of this story, I feel hesitant to because the content of it is pretty grim and honestly makes me squirm a bit. Because of that, I feel like I should place another content warning here: if you’re easily upset by stories of children being harmed in any way. Unlike last time however, I opted to censor the homophobic/racial slurs so Google doesn’t remove me from its indexing. Anyways, if children being harmed isn't your idea of an interesting read, you may want to scroll up/down and read anything that isn’t this story. Well, maybe not the Snuff Films write-up I did last year. That would be even worse. Anyways, let’s move onward.

Hollywood: a land of creativity, conspiracy, lust, drugs, liquor, has-beens, and just about every other thing you can imagine that isn’t related to decent morals. It’s a questionable place, but it’s led to some of the greatest artistic achievements this side of the Milky Way (I’m sure that out there, an alien race has created the greatest film about anal probing ever).

Until we find that alien race, we’re stuck with the creative masterpieces like Jaws, The Neverending Story, and other movies that I don’t care to remember at about ten at night. Deal with it, I’m not going to bend to the whim of people who I think read what I write. Anyways, now that I’ve alienated my audience, let’s continue onward.

Given the moral degeneracy that plagues Hollywood, you’re bound to find yourself a plethora of asinine conspiracy theories and propositions by truth seekers who’re hellbent on exposing the pre-conditioned programming of Hollywood. I myself think that tinsel town is guilty of having a serious bias when it comes to its political commentary and while that isn’t inherently bad (writers tend to insert their own views and desires into what they write; if your field of war is dominated by liberals, it’s going to have a liberal bias), it can definitely become overwhelming. It’s because of this that when you see something from Hollywood that’s conservative, it’s quite the standout piece.

So what does this have to do with today’s write-up? Well, we’re going to be focusing on a supposed Hollywood actor—or at least a former big named one—who appeared on 4Chan to reveal some of the shady, disgusting, heinous secrets that plague the land where magic appears on a giant screen. The other day, we talked about the fellow known as FBI Anon. Today, we shall talk about Hollywood Anon. Yet another famous 4Chan poster, this story will take us deep into the belly of the beast; Hollywood degeneracy at its finest. So come along, dear reader, let’s go ahead and take a trip to Tinsel Town. Lights, camera, action!

Monday, October 19, 2020

Mystery: FBI Anon


A quick warning: there’s some heavy language used in this write-up along with some fairly sensitive topics that are discussed. Though it involves 4Chan, that shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone. In spite of that, I figured that it would be better if I just address that so nobody gets butthurt if they were to read this and complain that I didn’t censor any of the naughty words and/or had the audacity to cover it. It’s an election year and the influence that a topic like the one discussed in this write-up has can be fairly significant—especially in the era of the Internet.

Before we begin this story, I would like to take a moment to state that the  blog has been reverted to Blogger’s default coloration. I did this primarily due to how the dreary tone didn’t mesh well with the generally upbeat tone of my writing. There was also how the white text was a pain to read if I wanted to revisit my old stuff to see if I thought it would be worth rewriting.

Now, with that said, I do know that some folks prefer the darker background—especially if you’re reading at night. I agree and I will do what I can to make sure that the best of both worlds is met. As such, I promise that if/when I make my own website that it will have a light mode and dark mode option. Until then, I believe that this blog is more about vibrancy and life; a place where the overwhelming morbid nature of mysteries is counteracted by writing that isn’t overly serious. With that said, let’s get to the story.

The Federal Bureau of Investigation—or simply FBI—is a contentious entity in the United States. The center of a great many memes, their work is admirable and has helped to make the world a safer place, but in the past has led to several controversies thanks to less-than savory Directors. Alas, the Bureau has marched on and become a symbol of protection—and evil.

Indeed, there is a fair bit of division in the public eye when it comes to the Bureau. While the majority of Americans trust them, their figureheads have historically been divisive. The current Director, Chris Wray, is well liked by some and seen as spineless by others. His predecessor, James Comey, was seen that way too. Prior to him, Robert Mueller (who served as the Special Council head in the Russian interference fiasco) was also divisive. Heck, almost every FBI Director has been divisive.

The only ones who haven’t been are J. Edgar Hoover, William Sessions, and Louis Freeh. The reason? They were widely reviled by nearly everyone. Hoover is seen as one of the worst leaders of anything in American history, Sessions utilized government funding to lavish himself, and Freeh was a clown masquerading as J. Edgar Hoover.

Now, does any of this inherently mean the Bureau is evil? I wouldn’t say so. Each Special Agent is, at their heart, human. They’re subject to their own flaws and I would guess that they mean well in their intentions. Though of course, those they follow are subject to extreme scrutiny. That’s why with today’s story, the figurehead will play a very, very vital role—in this case, James Comey.

You see, back in the wonderful year of 2016, there was a fellow who’s become known as FBI Anon. He posted a great many things on 4Chan’s controversial /pol/ board that made a lot of users raise their eyebrows in surprise. Though was any of it true? Well, let’s see if we can find out.

Sunday, October 11, 2020

Mystery: Real Humans Died Out Millennia Ago


How goes it, oh dear reader? For me: it goes swimmingly. The weather’s gotten so much cooler, the autumn breeze feels like paradise on Earth, and most of all: I’m writing! I’ve also been cited on Reddit and /pol/, so that’s really cool too.

Speaking of Reddit, I was snooping around on the thread where someone had linked my 2006 Volleyball Incident write-up (which remains my most popular one to date and it makes me so glad to know that I wrote something of merit). It was on this post that I shamelessly advertised myself and acted like a hotshot for about 3 seconds in real life that I decided to find some material to write about.

Scrolling through the post, there were a lot of great ideas. Sentient soy (soyface.jpg anyone?), The Simpsons is real footage, pancreas denial (I can hear a good friend of mine ripping his hair out and flying to the United States to kick me in the stomach until my esophagus is ejected from my back), and God’s Last Wish were but three that I floated around. Alas, they weren’t chosen as I have absolutely no desire to cover them. Well, maybe I’ll cover the one on The Simpsons sometime soon.

After this, I gave up for a few and stared at the ceiling reconsidering my life choices. I wondered why I bothered writing and suffered from a melodramatic episode where I angrily punched the wall and broke my knuckles. Okay, all of that is a lie, I scrolled up to the top of the page and looked at the top comment. It was asking what exactly real humans died out millennia ago was about. Such a notion like that is ripe for creative fiction and for speculation. So today, let’s go over it. This is in no ways pandering to the entire post in hopes that I garner more of a following. No, really, it isn’t. I’m just bored and want to cover something silly. So come along, dear reader! Let’s cover this weird theory and see if reality is weirder than we think it is.

Friday, October 9, 2020

Mystery: The Flannan Isles Lighthouse


This story is dedicated to my friend Jif. Thank you for being so supportive.

Lighthouses: they can tell you a thousand stories from the outside. Within their interiors, the number increases a thousandfold. They’re simplistic demeanor and lonesome, desolate atmosphere is a brilliant masquerade put on by the even more simplistic architectural structure. In simpler terms: lighthouses are unique. For something that ends up being a home for a man to help bring seafaring men and women back to shore, they end up telling you more stories than a war veteran can. Whether that be due to the isolatory nature (which is a case of depression waiting to happen) of them or because of sick sailors arriving back at shore to seek treatment.

Lighthouses also typically become secondary homes for their keepers; this in turn leads to them becoming haunted beyond belief. Big Bay Lighthouse and St. Augustine’s Lighthouse are two that come to mind when one thinks of a haunted cigarette-building (at least here in the United States). Though the haunted variety of these buildings will have to wait until December. For now, I want to shift the focus onto something a lot more unique.

As stated earlier: lighthouses are a case of depression waiting to happen and this is by no means hyperbole. They are, through and through, something that can drive a man insane. You needn’t look further than watching 2019’s The Lighthouse to feel like you’re going mad—especially if you thought that Robert “Battinson” Pattinson couldn’t act. Though really, can you blame anyone? Isolation from human contact—or being stuck in a building with other people you loathe—is bound to drive someone to lose their mind. So what do you do? Well, some may say you’d kill the people you don’t like, throw them to the waves, and then pretend that they “fell into the ocean”. Others may suggest you quit. Then some may say you jump into the ocean and become an ocean man.

Unlike most other times on this blog, that question is not something I will discard because it serves as a segway into another topic entirely. Rather, that question is part of today’s story through and through. The Flannan Isles Lighthouse is notorious for a great many reasons. Known as the location where three lighthouse keepers vanished, this guiding light for many a sailor was the inspiration for the aforementioned film The Lighthouse and conjures numerous images of lonesomeness and silence. So let us take a trip to over a century ago and seek out the truth to one of the world’s most maddening unsolved disappearance cases.

Monday, October 5, 2020

What Could Have Been: Dead Island 2 (Rewrite)


When I look back on the work I did from last year—specifically early last year—I often wince. Stylistically, it feels way too self-serious and lacks the spark that I think my current work has. Heck, even stuff from early this year feels like it doesn’t have the seem pizazz that I think my most recent work has. As such, I’ve really wanted to take time to slowly rewrite some of the pieces that I’m passionate about or that hold a special place in my heart.

Now, while I won’t devote, say, a week or something to rewriting piece after piece, I want to take a bit of time to rewrite another one as the game in question holds a special place in my heart as the original is a low-key favorite of mine. That and something happened back in June of this year that I think is worth mentioning. As such, today, I want to go back and rewrite the piece I did on the still unreleased video game Dead Island 2. So, with the sun shining, the warm California breeze in our hair, and with the growling of zombies filling the air, let’s dive headfirst into the apocalypse!

Thursday, October 1, 2020

Mystery: Wendigo

Good morning, dear reader. At least, it’s morning as of the time of this posting. Let’s take a trip into the woods together. It’s a terrifying place full of mystery; a desolate land where one can become attuned to nature. However, it’s also a land of danger. Wild animals reside here and while most are docile, this is their home and should you get too close to, say, a mama bear and her cub, you can find yourself ending up like the Grizzly Man.

Today’s story is going to be a rather short, brisk one. After the monstrously lengthy tale of Jack the Ripper, I want to take a moment to sit back, relax, and channel our inner demon[s] into a story. I wish for you to do just this; look inside of yourself. Unleash all of the anger and wrath inside of you. Now go clean up the mess you made; your home is a wreck.

All done? Good, now that you have manifested a Wendigo, start running. That thing’s going to eat you, your family, your puppy, and your neighbors. Seriously, run. It’s right behind you and it smells of blood and copper.

Monday, September 28, 2020

Mystery: WR 104

Oh hey, welcome to my blog once more dear reader. Today, we’re going off to the final frontier: space. Home to more lifelessness than a congressional hearing, space is a fascinating place and it’s actually what I had my sights set on before I found my passion for writing (I had aspirations to be an astronomer). By and large, it’s not the most interesting thing to look at; the distance between Earth and the Moon is so vast that, when furthest from us, you could fit every single place between us and the Moon.

Indeed, there’s a lot of nothing in space, but that doesn’t make it uninteresting. The prospect of life on other planets is a fascinating one and to colonize a planet such as Mars is something that would be fascinating; one thing I hope to see in my life is for humanity to step foot on another world.

Sunday, September 27, 2020

Mystery: Jack the Ripper


Having grown up with a father who’s a law enforcement officer, my childhood was heavily influenced by shows centered on crime and stories of those who committed acts of evil being caught. This ranged from Scooby-Doo to Forensic Files and America’s Most Wanted, all of which I greatly enjoyed.

As life went on, my fascination in these stories only grew. While I never planned on pursuing a career in law enforcement (not that I could at this point given my physical disabilities), I always loved to read about how these horrible people would slip up and get caught and what their motivations were. It has never ceased to blow my mind as to how little it takes for someone to decide that they’ll take another human’s life. That’s not even touching on unsolved crimes, which are even more fascinating in my eyes. The many questions that surround them really put into perspective the tagline to the 2007 film Zodiac. There’s more than one way to lose your life to a killer.

This brings me to today’s story. Our subject today has brought many detectives and sleuths—amateur and professional—to their knees. So, if you would be so kind as to join me, let’s take a gander at one of the luckiest humans to have ever lived. This is the story of Jack the Ripper.

Tuesday, September 8, 2020

Mystery: The Bloop

The ocean: it makes up most of our planet and is home to a great many fascinating and majestic creatures. Dolphins, sharks, whales, squids, and Jason Mamoa are but a few of the magnificent denizens that lurk in the depths of its comfy, blue surface. It’s below this surface that a great many mysteries lurk: the Mariana Trench Sea Serpent, reports of living plesiosaurs, underwater civilizations, living megalodons, and many other stories come from sailors, fishermen, and average Joes alike. It’s a place of wonder, awe, and fascination. So it should come as no surprise that upwards of 95% of the ocean remains unexplored. 

Despite so much of the ocean not being explored, most of us often look to the stars to colonize Mars and proclaim Elon Musk as our God-Emperor, Indeed, we likely know more about the cosmos than we do about the vast majority of our own planet. Every year, new species of animals are discovered in and out of the ocean, so if you were to ask me: I would say we should start diving down into the depths more often.

As you may have guessed by now: today’s story will do just that, though it holds an “official” explanation. So why cover it? Well, I received this story as a request last year and attempted to write it. Although I was successful, the end result was something I was very disappointed with; it was like a half-baked Wikipedia article. So I deleted it and decided to focus my efforts elsewhere (I believe I went on to write about the 3x Killer after scrapping it).

From there, I let the idea collect dust until now, a little under one year later. I’m feeling a lot more motivated and want to take a shot at what’s known as the Bloop once more. So from hell’s heart I shall stab at thee! Let us dive into the ocean and see what the truth is behind this enigmatic sound.

Thursday, September 3, 2020

Mystery: The Old Tape

Howdy, dear reader. Tell me: do you listen to the radio? Of course you don’t, we only listen to our own playlists because streaming killed the radiostar. Lucky for us, some people inexplicably still listen to the radio instead of blasting the same song on loop for 3 hours during their daily commute; stuck in traffic again, wagie? Don’t worry, Spotify Premium only costs you half of what gasoline will when you’re home by 6:30 in the evening.

Well, that’s not on topic, now is it? I dare say it is, bros. You see, today, we’re headed to my home state: New York—also known as the Big Apple and the Empire State. When I think New York, I think of using up gas because of traffic. Funny joke, but let’s talk about New York for a moment. It’s home to Wall Street, Manhattan, and the most Presidents in United States history as of the time of this writing (Martin van Buren, Millard Fillmore, Theodore Roosevelt, Franklin D. Roosevelt, and the current President: Donald J. Trump). Really interesting when you think about it; also, be sure to vote come November if you’re an American citizen so you can pretend that your vote matters if you don’t live in a swing state.

Ah, but where was I? Oh right, New York. This state is a cesspool, but that’s besides the point. When it comes to mysteries however, it’s got some interesting stuff under its belt. The 3X Killer, the 2008 Time Square Bombing, and the cost of living being feasible to anyone without the surname of Rockefeller are but three of the dozens of stories I could tell from the Corona Capital of the Planet (or CCP as I call it). We aren’t going to be covering any of those stories—though the bombing is one my immediate to-do list. Nay, we’re here to talk, well, radio! I said that two paragraphs ago, no?

Radio, although it may seem archaic to anyone who isn’t at least 20, was the way I listened to music before I had those new fangled smartphones. It was also how some folks would screw around; calling into radio stations to say stupid things before hanging up and leaving the host wondering why they didn’t take up a job on CNN. Today’s story is sort of like that, except it takes place in relationship to a college—or those places that leave you in debt until you’re letting your parents down one last time since you didn’t get a six-figure job.

Let’s finally get this introduction on track though. My insane, giddy rambling aside, today’s story brings us to New York; a radio station named WKCR. Those familiar with what I would call “creepy media” will likely recognize that name. It’s a station licensed by Columbia University. Back in 1995, a weird interruption took place. Nowadays, it’s known as the Old Tape or the WKCR Radio Interruption. I’ve been meaning to cover it for a few months now, but have had quite a bit of trouble making the story work. Though today, I will make it work.

With that said: I would just like to note that if this tape is old, then I’m very scared because I wonder how soon I’ll be thrown into the old folks home; also, someone please call the Military, I think my parents are zombies and World War Z is about to become a documentary.

Ah, this is going to be an energetic write-up. How I’ve missed this type of happiness in my life!

Wednesday, August 12, 2020

What Could Have Been: World of Warcraft: Warlords of Draenor (Rewrite)

Today, we’ll be doing something unique. For a long while, I’ve wanted to rewrite one of my write-ups, though never have I had the adequate time to do so. Recently however, I began to write a megalist of unmade and canceled movies and video games. However, I’ve had to delay it as I recently got a puppy and he has been a handful. There was one entry that I did write that I found to be exceptional though and I didn’t want it to collect dust as I did much smaller projects in my free time. What those smaller projects are: I honestly don’t know. I want to post a mystery or two this month, but it remains to be seen on whether or not I can muster the energy (let alone find the time) to craft something of merit.

Now, before we begin, I want to make note of something. I didn’t change anything in the way of what’s been written and as such, there’s likely a few typos and references to the aforementioned megalist itself. So I do apologize on that front.

So with all of that out of the way, and without further ado: enjoy this rewrite of last year’s What Could Have Been on Warlords of Draenor.

Tuesday, July 21, 2020

Mystery: Jeffrey Epstein Created Fortnite

Let’s play a silly game, dear reader. Let’s take a trip to the video game store—I would say Gamestop, but those aren’t high quality enough. So we’ll go to “Game Store” and pretend that it’s a place where you can play Dungeons & Dragons, collect Funko Pops (those creepy things with big heads), and post clown memes without the risk of being publicly shamed. It’s a great place, but it’s even better when you realize you can have get-togethers with people from all around your town/city. You can play games locally; couch-style co-op and what have you. All in the safe, comfy location that is Game Store.

However, there’s one thing that sticks out. In a secluded room, there are the sounds of younger folks; children. They’re screaming, laughing, and calling each other vulgar names that would get me unindexed faster than you could say “Vert, please post more often.”. Or heck, just say the first word. Anyways, you peer into this room and see cheetos, piss stains on a toilet, and it smells of things that would get me unindexed yet again. It reminds you of when you were 10-years-old and lived with your parents. Now you’re 25-years-old and live with your parents, but you wear a mask because of a novel virus and insist on playing Dungeons & Dragons; your mage that has PTSD will someday get that legendary staff from the warlock!

Anyways, there are numerous Xbox Ones, PS4s, and PCs. In the distant corner, you see a broken Nintendo Switch because apparently, kids these days don’t enjoy Nintendo consoles. Against your better judgement, you enter and are immediately swarmed by kids asking you to play one game: Fortnite.

Indeed, today’s story centers on Fork Knife (better known as Fortnite to anyone who isn’t me and isn’t amused like a little child at insipid things). That global phenomenon that was made by Epic Games (which is totes bad because China). Every Twitch streamer has played it; heck, everyone who isn’t me has played it. It’s a Battle Royale game that’s wildly popular and I don’t really get the appeal. However, I’m not a big fan of PvP games. A lot of others are though and to that I say: good on them. I hope they keep having fun.

Alas, today’s story features another icon: Jeffrey Edward Epstein. The man who ran a global child sex trafficking ring. A truly vile, reprehensible figure, Epstein’s name is one that will earn looks of disgust to anyone familiar with him who has an iota of a soul. Though if you pair the two together, a conundrum appears. How on Earth could these two things go together? Well, that’s where the story begins. Let’s ask ourselves one very simple, peculiar question: did Jeffrey Epstein create Fortnite?

Monday, July 20, 2020

Mystery: Now They Hear It All The Time

The realm of Reddit is one that I’m highly hesitant to ever go near when it comes to content. While some may see it as more reputable than, say, 4chan, I think that Reddit’s voting system causes it to create not only a hivemind, but a sense of believability that can be passed along to the average user. This, in turn, can create the aforementioned hivemind. With a website like 4chan: there may be a hivemind at work on some boards, but it’s at least transparent about being one. Reddit isn’t that way, but that could just be my experience with the site.

In spite of that, there are times when Reddit provides me with something that’s a bit too good to pass up. In this case though, I didn’t find it myself. Rather, I found it from the fandom site “Paranormal World”. I went to this site when I covered the Nickelodeon Killer back in May and I made it clear (or at least I hope I did) that I didn’t want to seem like I was poaching content from the site. The person who operates the site deserves every bit of credit for finding these stories; I think that the stories they’ve covered are extremely fascinating (if a bit on the hard to believe side). Today, I want to make a journey back there because this one in particular really caught my attention as being something exceptionally interesting.

The story in question is about a mysterious PSA that a few Reddit users recalled seeing, but have never been able to find anything regarding its existence. That, on its own, is worth a write-up. Missing/lost media is something I’m really into, though I seldom cover it on its blog as it requires a fair bit more work, though I intend on covering it a little bit more as the year goes on—though I hope to have something like that posted this month.

Moving on though: it’s worth mentioning that this story, aside from just being something related to lost media, also reads a lot like a horror story. That, to me, is usually indicative of a creepypasta and given that this is related to television, one’s mind would drift into the realm of, say, Candle Cove, The Wyoming Incident, or Happy Appy. A mysterious piece of television history that hardly anyone remembers, but a few recall it and talk about it online. That screams of the the first and third (Happy Appy’s original story being a direct, shameless ripoff of Candle Cove) with the second being a broadcast intrusion as far as my shoddy memory can be asked to recall. Though I digress; let’s get back on track. We’re here to discuss a PSA and I don’t wish to waste too much time on the intro.

Due to how the story reads like a creepypasta, I was a bit hesitant at first to cover it. However, given it’ll be a bit before I believe I’m truly able to get my life fully back on track, I wanted to take a leap into a sort of “real life” creepypasta. So that brings us to the story at hand. As stated earlier, it takes us back to Paranormal World. It’s here that there is a page entitled Now They Hear It All The Time. I wish to take a look at this story because it’s certainly odd to see a story that screams “creepypasta” that’s treated with genuine sincerity. So let’s see if we can get to the bottom of this peculiar PSA and have a bit of fun with a potential piece of television history.

Wednesday, July 8, 2020

Mystery: J376

This story is dedicated to my close friend Seriff Pilcrow. While this isn’t everything he likely desired it to be, I nonetheless did my best given the circumstances that have transpired around this one write-up. Thank you for everything, bud. I greatly appreciate your assistance.

This story’s cursed. I swear on a Bible, it’s cursed. Every time I try to write about it, something bad happens. Don’t believe me? Let’s take a look at the track record for it.

September 2019: I suffered a terrible nightmare about my ex-girlfriend that led to me contemplating grabbing my father’s service handgun and shooting myself in the head.

November 2019: A group of friends that I frequently hung out with got into a major argument. I played the mediator for weeks (this began around the time as the event mentioned above too) upon weeks and I finally broke down from the constant fighting and bickering. The two groups fractured and I was forced to abandon my plans for last year’s Decemystery. I ultimately scrapped this story because of how stressed I was; how I managed to not miss a single day of Decemystery 2019 is beyond me, but I consider it an act of God (and my sheer unbridled will to not fall behind on my work, though at what cost, I’ll never know).

January 2020: My acid reflux began to flare up extremely badly and I was forced to take time off; this did ultimately lead to me deciding to make the megalist of 500 conspiracy theories. This is also the only time that anything good came from this nightmarishly awful mystery.

March 2020: I suffered from a severe depressive episode due to my Yellow Lab dying; I scrapped covering it as a surprise for a friend of mine.

May 2020: I ended up having a complete and total mental breakdown in the middle of the month the week I’d begun to work on it once more. I’m still recovering from the breakdown because it was triggered by a year’s worth of pent up emotional distress and anger; the end result was five separate suicide attempts, losing a close group of friends I’d made four months ago, and being diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

July 2020: The day I started to cover this, I nearly had a breakdown due to the regret I’ve experienced due to the above mentioned breakdown. This culminated in a terrifying 3-hour-long mood swing where I became lucid to my desires to slit my wrists with razor blades and repeatedly contemplated other methods to end my life.

Lucky for me: seven is one of my lucky numbers. So on this seventh attempt, we’ll be covering J376.

Tuesday, July 7, 2020

Mystery: The Crank Incident

I like movies. I like movies a lot. Just ask my friends who never comment on this blog (c’mon guys, at least leave a comment saying “good job, Vert!”) about how much I love them. If there’s one thing I’m silent about, it’s how much I love to read about movies, the troubled production of some movies, and generally about what the latest movie gossip is. It’s fun to talk about them to say the least and as such, today’s story caught my attention. It’s known as the Crank Incident and rather than write a proper introduction, I want to dive right into it. You’ll see why if you click the jump button. Or you can scroll down and read about Five Nights At Freddy’s. That’s cool too.

Monday, July 6, 2020

Mystery: Is Five Nights At Freddy's Based on a True Story?

I promised a few friends of mine last month that I would cover this story this month. Given how miserable I’ve been as of late, I figured I’d try to cheer myself up by writing about it today. In hindsight, this was a terrible idea because I want to use glass shards to brush my teeth simply looking at the title. So without further ado, let’s ask a very simple (and silly) question: is Five Nights At Freddy’s based on a true story? 

Friday, June 26, 2020

Mystery: Paul Deering

It’s been a really, really hellish past month for me; so much so that I cannot go into any reasonable detail without tearing up. The abridged version is that I’ve gone through a ridiculous amount of emotional and mental trauma and stress that’s caused me to take a serious break from writing and admittedly, I should probably not be sitting here writing this story. However, I wanted to have something up on the blog for this month. So let’s stop with the idle chatter and dive into the story of Paul Deering.

Friday, May 29, 2020

Mystery: The Manor Road Pig-Dog

Time to head over to Baltimore County. Our story today is the Manor Road Pig-Dog.

Thursday, May 28, 2020

Mystery: Sleep Paralysis Demons

A fairly popular image used when discussing Sleep Paralysis Demons.

Today’s story is something that I’ll be discussing more off the back of my hand based on what I know as opposed to citing various sources. So rather than waste time, let’s discuss
Sleep Paralysis Demons.

Wednesday, May 27, 2020

Mystery: Nyagwaiheogwa

A picture of a bear from Wikipedia.

Due to that lovely thing called real life problems, I’ve been seriously forced to forego the plans for the end of the month stories. However, I’m too stubborn to give up now. So stories like (which I promised when I wrote about Meat Stations) won’t be covered. However, I still have some fun, peculiar little tales to share with you all. However, they’re likely to be extremely short. I digress though; today’s story is the Nyagwaiheogwa.

Tuesday, May 26, 2020

Mystery: Cookie Monster

The only known source for this story.

I want to return to Michael Newton’s Encyclopedia of Cryptozoology for today’s story. Yesterday, we (very briefly) talked about the Easter Bunny. That isn’t the only weirdly named Bigfoot-type cryptid out there though. There’s also the wonderfully named Cookie Monster. Let’s take a gander at this story.

Monday, May 25, 2020

Mystery: Easter Bunny

Poached from a Forbes article. Sorry, Forbes. Please don't sue.

As of late, I’ve been feeling a mixture of burnt out and just flat out exhausted. While this year in general has been kicking me while I’m down, this month in particular has been grueling. As such, I’m just taking the easy way out and covering a lot of really easy stories until we get to the capstone story. So for today, let’s talk about the Easter Bunny. No, not the Easter Bunny you’re likely thinking of. Today, we’re off to Michigan.

Sunday, May 24, 2020

Mystery: Food City Aliens

Shamelessly poached from the ObscUrban Legend Wiki. Also, this is the Food City logo.

Today’s story comes from the ObscUrban Legend Wiki. I had planned to cover it about two weeks ago, but I didn’t. I forget what story specifically I swapped it out for, but it was probably The Man in the Plastic Bag. Though I’m covering it now. It’s short, sweet, and quite funny. I call it the Food City Aliens.

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Mystery: Fleshgaits

I’ve been waiting for this day for a very long time. It’s finally time to cover Fleshgaits.

Friday, May 22, 2020

Mystery: September 23, 2017 and The Great Sign of Revelation 12

Religion is one of those topics I try my best to steer clear of—in spite of how there are numerous stories that I want to cover because of how many fascinating mysteries surround it. For me, it’s provided an insurmountable level of comfort and peace in the face of topics like death and what comes after it. It’s helped me to have a much more positive outlook on life as a whole too.

Though as is the case with any religion: there’s always the concept of “The End”. Now what is The End? Well, it’s Armageddon; the Apocalypse. The End of the World. When Heaven and Hell fight. Throughout the ages, many have suspected that The End was just around the corner and nowadays, it seems that The End is going to happen next week. Alas, it never does and as it stands, every prophecy, every prediction, and every claim has failed to yield anything substantial. So why do we keep falling for it? Well, some people simply fear death. Some want to see their children grow up, to have families of their own, or simply love their life. It’s those people that many charlatans feed off of in the way of selling tickets into Heaven or to have them purchase salvation from the Lord (this goes for any and all religions mind you).

This concept of fear and the dread of The End is where today’s story will take us. It's one I had planned for September this year, but I decided to cover it today as I felt oddly motivated to cover it. Known as the Great Sign of Revelation 12, this is going to be a very religious mystery, but I encourage non-believers to read this story too. It’s a very fascinating one and if I’m to be quite honest: I think this is one of my best works yet. Let’s not waste anymore time though. Let’s dive into this fantastical tale.

Thursday, May 21, 2020

Mystery: Meat Stations

I’ve been playing a lot of Borderlands 3 lately. I’ve chosen FL4K as my character of choice and have been using the Jabber as my pet. This, naturally, means that a lot of the time, I’m spent swearing to myself because the poor thing dies over and over and over. This has led me to ponder to myself why I even bother acquainting myself with it given its tendency to keel over the second that someone looks at it funny.

Oh well, I guess that’s just how game development is. Though we aren’t here to talk about that—at least not a lot. In the time I’ve spent playing the game, I’ve pondered exactly what order the stories I had in mind for this month would go. Naturally, a lot of stories got nixed while others were added in, but two have been on my radar recently that I haven’t been able to pick between. While I know for a fact they’ll both be covered this month, the one that would be up to bat first has remained contested in my mind. One of them is called, a very oddball theory with a name worthy of an award.

The other takes us to a crazy, grisly, and warped world filled with cannibalism, human farms, and human trafficking. It’s this theory I ultimately went with because for whatever reason, I was feeling a bit grisly. Known as Meat Stations, this theory is how I imagine Cannibal Holocaust would’ve been written if it was made by someone who doesn’t realize the purpose of the Conspiracy Iceberg. So rev up those fryers and let’s get cooking.