Oh, hey, dear reader. I recalled how to use a keyboard.
Nah, just kidding. The reality is—as you might expect from me—that the year has not treated me kindly, and the overwhelming shame and despair of not producing content on this blog has left me feeling drained. The culprit? Bipolar disorder! My eternal nemesis who leaves me wishing I could reach inside my brain and punch it square in the frontal lobe.
Bipolar isn’t the only thing to have caused me trouble this year, though. I’ve also gone through a lot of personal struggles that I am not comfortable sharing on here, though, involving a friend just… cutting all contact with me out of the blue. As in, in the middle of a conversation. It’s like she vanished off the face of the Earth. I have no idea what happened to her, and even now, I’m worried that something bad happened to her.
Alas, distance prevents me from finding answers, so that’s… fun—assuming you have the same sense of humor as Mark Hoffman. But life goes on, whether I like it or not. If she happens to see this update, I truly hope you’re okay and that all is well.
That aside, why am I posting this in the middle of June when I’ve been dead silent, yet again, for the entire year? Well, I am writing again, as has been the tradition since 2023. The first half of the year is awful, and the second half is pleasant. The only difference is that this year, I’ve been prescribed lithium and Latuda to combat my bipolar, so there’s a chance this isn’t a coincidence and that I am, in fact, getting better.
So, what’s my plan? Write Decemystery 2025 and pray that 2026 doesn’t kick me in the stomach the moment the calendars collectively read “January.” So, with that said, see you all in 4,061 hours!
we haven't forgotten you vertigo 🎃
ReplyDeleteI genuinely appreciate that. Life's been an absolute nightmare, and no matter how many times I tell myself that I'll write an update today, I feel like it's the most arduous and painful task imaginable.
DeleteIt means so much to me that there are people who still visit this site. Thank you.
I just wanted to say I appreciate the honesty here. Mental health struggles are real, and showing vulnerability like this matters. When life gets overwhelming productivity isn’t the priority survival is. I’ve had semesters where I wanted to pay someone to do my exam just because stress made studying impossible. It’s normal to feel burnt out disconnected or uncertain. I hope things become lighter for you, and that you continue sharing authentically when you’re ready.
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